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“For what?” I asked.
He pulled back slightly so he could see my expression. “Being with you is a gift.”
“But I’m not a—” The word virgin got stuck in my throat because I was when I was with Heath; he never made that move. I knew why he held back, but I always wished my first time was with him.
A soft smile played on his lips. “It was our first time, and I always knew it would be a gift when it happened.”
I wanted to remind him that he was the one who’d walked away last time, but I couldn’t. I didn’t want to mar this special moment with regrets from our past.
Then he kissed me again, erasing any negative thoughts I was having. I wanted to stay here forever, cocooned in his arms in his bed. No one was expecting me in California.
My business was online. My assistants lived all over the world. No one needed me to be in California physically. I could go and do whatever I wanted.
“Can you stay?”
Nerves fluttered in my stomach. “I have a flight scheduled for tomorrow.”
He brushed my hair off my forehead. The movement was so tender my heart squeezed in response. No one had ever looked at me like he did. It was as addicting as it was dangerous. I couldn’t get used to being with him like this. I didn’t know when he’d leave again, but I knew he would.
“Can you stay for a few more days? I can go over the renovations with you, and we can spend more time together.” His expression was pleading.
What did I have to lose? I also wondered what if, and this was my chance. “I can change my flight.”
He smiled, warming me from the inside out.
I just hoped I wasn’t making a big mistake. That I wasn’t placing my heart in his hands only for him to squeeze it or drop it and walk away. When we were together the first time, I would describe it as young love. But what just happened between us was in a different stratosphere. He had the power to obliterate me. And unlike him, I didn’t have a family or friends to fall back on.
It was just me picking up the pieces.
He rolled to his back and reached for me to cuddle into his side. “You won’t regret this.”
I didn’t say anything, but my stomach was already twisted in knots. I wasn’t sure what the right decision in this situation was. But I knew if I walked away, I’d always have those questions. This was my chance to see if our relationship was a flicker or steady and true.
I settled into his arms, breathing in his scent and marveling that we weren’t lying on a blanket in the woods but in his cabin. I couldn’t believe I was here, but at the same time, it felt right.
In Heath’s arms was the only place I’d ever felt like I truly belonged. I felt whole for once, as if the pieces of me that had scattered with every hurt from my mother, my father, my brother, and Heath, had come back together.
I listened to the steady beat of his heart underneath my cheek and waited for his muscles to soften and relax. I fought my flight response to go back to my room, or even to the inn. But I’d made him a promise to stay for a few days. To see where this would take us, and I wouldn’t go back on that.
I was just as curious as he was. I finally closed my eyes, reliving the dinner with his family and today. I drifted off for a few hours, and when I woke, Heath was moving me to my back. “I’m sorry. I’m hungry. I’m going to get something to eat, but you can sleep.”
My stomach rumbled in response. The clock by his bedside read eleven. “We never ate dinner.”
He smiled softly. “We were preoccupied with other things.”
The afternoon came back to me, the anxiety about my mom’s letter to the attorney, the fear that she’d come back only to cause more trouble, and then the rest of the evening with Heath.
“Don’t think about your parents or the inn. It’s just you and me.”
I nodded.
“You can wait here or come with me,” he said as he got out of bed and pulled on sweats.
I flipped off the blanket, realizing I was still naked.
Heath tossed me a T-shirt and sweatpants. “These will be big.”
“Thanks,” I said as I dressed quickly before heading into the bathroom to pull my hair into a ponytail and wash my face with cold water. I couldn’t believe I’d let go so completely with Heath when I couldn’t with any other man.
