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He scoffs.“Fine…”
We line up the last two dummies into their bays, and I lean against the wall.
“You’re going to bust my chops again over my vocab?”
He perches himself on a plastic calf and crosses his arms. He’s taken off his jacket now, and his forearms bulge with muscle and veins. “Why are you here?”
“I told you, I’m taking a break.”
“From what?”
I stare out into the dim-lit arena at nothing in particular. I’m not ready to tell anyone else what’s going on. It was hard enough to pour my heart out to Colt. And I only did that because I needed his help. “Just life.” I drop my gaze back to his. “Don’t you ever just want a break from life?”
“No, Joey. A break from life is actually the opposite of what I’d ever want. Is that whatyouwant?” Concern blazes from his eyes like I said something I didn’t.
“You know what I mean.” I suggest he’s overreacting. “I’m not suicidal.”
He braces his arms to his sides and leans forward. “I didn’t know what you meant, and you can’t fault me for checking. Something is going on with you, and people don’t ask enough about that kind of shit. If you’re here, something is wrong.”
His comment steals my next breath. He’s right. He’s absolutely right. People see the signs all the time and don’t say shit. It’s hard to ask a question like that, and I respect Ashton more than ever for it.
I laugh, but nothing is funny. “So you came to check on me?”
“Course not. I just need a babysitter, right?” The corner of his mouth quirks.
A burst of something like happiness goes off in my belly like firecrackers. In all my life, I’ve never met someone quite like Ashton. I have a loving family. Logan is protective almost in spite of my best interests. Colt goes straight to solution mode if I ever have a problem. My mom is an infinite supply of words of wisdom, and Dash is like a secret weapon I could deploy at any time if I needed to.
I walk over to the calf opposite Ashton—the one who has always been comfortable enough to sit through my pains. He was protective but also nurturing. And it’s the exact reason why my heart yearned for this special balm when I was at my lowest.
I outline my finger along the plastic ear of the calf. “You’re so annoying.”
“Why?”
“The way you just… ” God, he has no idea. It’s the first time I’ve felt seen in ages, and a genuine smile spreads across my heated face.
He uses his good foot to kick the toe of my boot. “The way I don’t just acceptfine? Nobody worth a damn in your life will, I can tell you that. You don’t have to talk to me, but what kind of friend would I be if I didn’t ask?”
I draw a line in the sand between our feet, and the symbolism crashes through me. I should build a strong wall between us. Opening up to Ashton has always made me feel better but also fall harder.
I stare at the sand. “You are a solid friend for asking. And I appreciate it.”
When I glance up, his eyebrows are pulled together in concern.
“But I don’t feel like talking about it. I’m not sure I really even know what I want or how I feel, so I just want to take a break from thinking about it.”
Ashton stands. “Understood.”
We stare at each other for a moment, his eyes flicker with a thousand more questions.
His gaze searches my face. “So… you need a break?”
I nod.
He pops himself up to standing. “Okay then. Let’s get the fuck out of here.”
I slide my hands into my back pockets. “Yeah? Where?”
“Sly’s?”
