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Westin told me once that I’m like a dog trained to fight. Once my jaws are locked in something, I’ll never let go. He’s right, especially when it comes to my redbird.
I smoke for a while, looking out over my ranch. Around two, the door opens and she steps out. She’s in sweats, her bra, and my extra jacket. It’s slipping off her shoulder, the light making her freckled skin glow.
“You feeling alright?” I ask.
She leans against my body, pushing her arm around my waist. “The meds kicked in. I didn’t know you smoked cigars.”
“One of my many vices.”
She turns her face up, a little crease between her eyes. “You have no vices.”
She’s so fucking sweet. I kiss her forehead and she bends into me.
“I’m a hedonist for you,” I say.
She smiles. “You are pretty dirty in bed,” she admits.
“I’ve gone easy on you.”
Her brows rise and she turns, leaning against the railing to face me. “What else do you want to do to me that you haven’t already?’
I release a stream of smoke and lean over her, a hand on the rail on either side of her body.
“Choke your perfect throat. Fuck you until you pass out and fuck you to wake you back up. Find out how much fucking your mouth can take before you tap out. Paint your ass with bruises until you can’t sit on it.”
Her eyes widen, lids fluttering.
“You’re a painslut and I want to know how far I can take that,” I say.
Her lips part, her tongue flicking out. Her throat bobs.
“Why are you a sadist?” she whispers.
I consider feeding her some bullshit like I usually do, but I’m starting to think we’re past that. I bend in and her breath washes over my face. Our lips brush, our bodies tense, and then our mouths come together.
I kiss her slowly, thoroughly. Until she moans and I break away.
“I need a lot to feel,” I admit. “I’m just…numb. I have been for years.”
Pain flickers through her eyes. “You can change that.”
“Do you want me to?” I ask.
She takes a second to respond, but then she shakes her head.
“I want you as you are,” she whispers.
This time, when I kiss her like it’s the first and last time our mouths have touched. If I had the words, I’d tell her that she’sthe only cure I need for all the numbness in my heart. But I’m not good with words. So I let my body do the talking.
And I think she knows.
CHAPTER THIRTY-FOUR
KEIRA
We get back to the house at noon and Gerard disappears into the barn to get the horses settled. I drop my bag in the hall and walk through the quiet house. It’s the middle of the day so everyone is out, even the dogs. I slip off my boots and pad up the stairs.
“Miss Garrison.”
