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He slows his pace until he’s just barely moving in and out of me. I feel like I’ve just run a marathon consisting of only pure pleasure and nothing else, and my body is entirely spent from it.
When he kisses my lips, all I can think about is how sad it is that we’ve waited so long to feel this type of connection between the two of us.
Beau gets up and takes the condom off, throwing it in the trash next to my bed. “I’ll take that out when I leave,” he says with a laugh.
“Good idea.”
I sit up to get dressed, and he stops me by pulling my hands into his and standing me up so I’m pressed against him, skin to skin.
As his lips touch mine, I can’t help but remember my first time with Aaron and how different this feels afterward. Where everything was awkward with Aaron, Beau and I are older, maturer, and probably more ready for this type of a relationship.
He steps back from me and leans down to hand me my clothes before he picks up his own as well. We take our time getting dressed, both in a blissful daze as we gaze at each other and steal kisses any chance we get.
With the trash bag from my room in his hand, Beau and I exit my room and head out the front door, not wanting to risk another minute of my dad possibly coming home.
Once he throws the garbage away, he comes back to me, wrapping his arms around me and kissing me one more time before he has to take off.
I watch in awe as he hops in his truck and pulls away from the curb.
When I turn around, I see Aaron watching us from his couch in his living room. He might think I can’t see him, but the day light has shifted, and I clearly can. By the expression he’s wearing, he knows exactly what just happened and is not happy about it.
CHAPTERTHIRTY-EIGHT
Senior Year
Only a month left of school, and we will officially graduate! The time is going by so fast, but I’m ready. I’m ready to get out of this town and move from underneath my dad’s shadow.
The only problem is, I haven’t decided where I’m going to go to college yet.
Beau got a full ride scholarship to Cal Berkeley. I was surprised when he chose to go back to California, but when he told me that was where his dad went, I understood more. He’s asked me a few times to join him, but I don’t know how I feel about it.
When college applications were due, I applied there, just keeping my options open. I haven’t told him or my father that I got in. I love Beau, and I think I want to leave Tennessee, but moving to California almost feels like leaving the planet. I just don’t know if I can be that far away from my dad.
I also got into University of Tennessee, Ohio State, and Texas University. It wasn’t lost on Heather when she found out one of my options to go to college was the same college Aaron has a scholarship to, but my applying there had nothing to do with Aaron. All these schools have great drill teams, and though I couldn’t get a scholarship like the guys, I still plan on trying out for the team wherever I finally decide to attend.
I head out of my third-period class and run into Heather in the hallway.
“Have you made a decision yet?” she asks, and I shake my head. “Good. You’ll just stay here with me. There. Decision made.” She laughs as she wraps her arm around me.
She’s going to University of Tennessee, so of course she wants me to go there too.
“I wish it were that easy.”
“Well, what did you feel like when I said I made my mind up for you?”
I look at her in question.
“Did you feel even more dread, or did you feel like,Yeah, you’re right. Thank you for being so smart and helping me see the path I need to be on?” she states over dramatically with her hands held out wide, making me laugh.
“Definitely the first.”
She sighs. “Then, UT is not the place you truly want to go.” She stares off into space. “Even though you’ll miss me every day.”
I grab her arm. “That I will.”
She’s right too. When she said that’s what she chose for me, I instantly thoughtnoin my head. So, though I still don’t know exactly where I want to go, I do know I can cross UT off my list.
“Come on.” She drags me through the hall. “Don’t let it get you down. You’ll figure it out.”
