Page 16 of Her Drag Barbarian


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“I don’t care who you fuck!” I yelled, stalking down the hall into my own office and slamming the door.

It might not be in the conflict management best practices handbook, but it did make me feel a little better.

7

ELOWYN

Iwas going through a long stack of various complaints when I saw one I thought should be easy to fix.

“Hey, jackasses,” I said, as Deiondre and Luis passed by the door of my office. “Why haven’t you taken Schwarb in hand and helped him get better? He says he really would like advice.”

“Ushelp?” asked Luis in astonishment. “Have you notseenour bodies? Look how regal and willowy we are.”

He moved an arm gracefully in front of me.

“Schwarb, on the other hand,” Luis continued, “is built like a refrigerator. The only person who could give him tips is Beau, because Beau is built like fucking Zeus on Mount Olympus.”

Deiondre nodded sympathetically.

“Shit,” I said. “I guess I’ll just have to force Beau to tutor him.”

“How are you going to do that?” Deiondre asked.

“The only way Beau will help Schwarb is if he thinks he can show me up,” I said slowly. “Therefore, I am going to give Schwarb some pointers on how to move his body at practice today,” I said.

There was a short, stunned silence at this.

“Yougive pointers?” said Luis in a strangled voice.

“Now everyone has to not laugh,” I said. “That’s the only way it will work.”

“He isnotgoing to swallow that,” said Deiondre.

“I think we’ve established that there is no limit to what Beau will swallow,” I said severely. “He will swallow this if you all do your part.”

I hurried to wardrobe to change my clothes and then went into the practice room where all the queens were still in their exercise wear and stretching.

I walked between them, deciding how to start.

“What are you doing here, El?” Beau asked.

“Making sure you stretch,” I retorted severely. “It’s my job to keep you all safe and keep this club open. Muscle cramps are an ever-present danger.”

“We don’t need your supervision to stretch,” Beau said, looking up at me as he bent into a low split.

I ignored him.

“Schwarb, I noticed you have been a little stiff recently,” I said, hoping my tone was casual. “Watch me closely. I think I can help you loosen up a bit.”

I had changed into some tight shorts and a tighter top that showed a bit of the rounded curves of my tummy, hoping it would make my dancing tips even more conspicuously infuriating to Beau.

Then I began to demonstrate some moves, walking back and forth in front of the guys and running my hands over my body.

I saw Beau glance up at me, but he said nothing.

I got down on my hands and knees on the ground, slithering down on my belly and rolling my ass around in a way I hoped was at least vaguely enough like the queens did it so Beau wouldn’t be suspicious that this was a trap.

“Try to do it this way,” I said to Schwarb.

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