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He rears his head back. “I forgot you’ve never been to the aquatics building. It’s zucchini bikinis galore. Dickseverywhere. Old ones, too, because they do swim classes for decrepit people.”
“Elderlypeople,” I correct him. “God, you’re such an ass.”
He holds his hands up. “Hey, I’m not dissing them. I saw one dude; he was hanging out with some older ladies, and that dude was hung like a horse. When I grow up, I want to be that motherfucker.”
As we walk outside, he looks around. “Where’s your car?”
“I walked here. It’s only about a ten-minute stroll to my place. I figured, why not take advantage of the gorgeous weather?”
“Huh. Well, I’m about dead after two practices, so we’re taking my truck home.” He points to a black Chevy truck. “And since we can’t have alcohol, I say we go to DQ and get milkshakes instead.”
“Bro, are you insane? If I go to DQ, I’m getting a Blizzard.” I scoff. “I can’t be wasting a perfectly good trip to ice cream heaven on a milkshake.”
“One, don’t ever call me bro. And, two, you’re so hostile today.” He frowns. “But now that I think about it…same.”
Reaching his truck, we both climb inside. He peels out of the parking lot, and it’s like this is the most natural thing in the world, us hanging out. And what’s crazy is…it sort of feels like it is.
Brody O’Brien might have just become my best friend. And now, we have a pact that will keep us tied together. At least for a little while.
Brody
After stopping at my place, we head to hers. But as she directs me, the closer we get to it, the more I realize I’m pretty familiar with this building. In fact, when we pull in front of her apartment, I figure something out that’s pretty fucking crazy.
Bria Collins was the chick I saw walk by the window when I was balls deep in Tawney. Her face was hard to make out through the flowing curtains. But knowing that she is Tawney’s next-door neighbor, I know it had to be her.
“Be right back.” She hops out, headed to get her swimsuit.
Only, when she gets to the door, she sees me trailing behind her.
“Um…what are you doing?” She gives me an annoyed side-eye. “I’m literally just grabbing my swimsuit.”
“I want to see your place.” I shrug.
“Why? To see if it’s the same as…” She pauses, and I know she was about to say the neighbor’s but stopped herself. “Why do you care what my place looks like? Maybe it’s a she-cave with pictures of dicks on the walls and dildo candles everywhere.”
“Sounds awesome,” I deadpan. “Best friends should know what the inside of each other’s house looks like.”
“Really? Because we were just at your apartment and I stayed in the truck. Oh, and we’re best friends now?” She laughs, pushing the door open. “We move fast, don’t we?”
She set herself right up for what comes out of my mouth next.
“We can move as fast as you want. Blow job now? Sex later?”
Punching me in the gut, she glares, trying to keep a straight face. “Stop being annoying. Or I’ll never invite you into my self-made pact again. Come to think of it, I never invited you into this one to begin with. You invited yourself.”
“But you wanted me to join. You don’t have to play it off like you’re too cool for me.” I wink, following her inside. “You saw me, and you were like,Yep, that pathetic son of a bitch is going to join my nun crew.”
“We aren’t nuns!” She throws her head back. “This has zero to do with religion. Zero. Zip. Nada.”
“But can we just call ourselves the nunya group. Since we ain’t getting none-ya-pussy or dick?” I say before I look around her apartment.
It’s kept clean, but not overly tidy to the point where she has OCD. There are at least ten candles just in the kitchen area alone, along with an oil diffuser thing.
“You’re a fucking hippie.” I point to the candles. “But you lied—not one of these is shaped like a cock.”
“This is why I was going to leave you in the truck.” She groans before going into a room. A few minutes later, she reappears with a tote bag. “Let’s go, banana hammock.”
“You’re lucky I didn’t actually bring one. You would have seen my massive dick through the damn thing, and this whole celibate thing would have gone right out the window. I would have had to beat you off of me.”
