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When I step into my house, my parents right behind me, I smell one of Watson’s damn candles and can’t help but smile.I’m home.But then I remember it’s just us three living here now, no Haley. And it doesn’t feel quite as homey anymore.
Watson and Hunter waste no time coming toward me, pulling me into a big, cheesy group hug.
“Smells like a motherfucking bakery in here, Gentry.” I laugh. “Your mom is really upping her candle game, huh?”
He smiles proudly. Watson Gentry isn’t the type of dude who gives a shit if people make fun of him. He is who he is, he likes what he likes, and that’s one thing I’ve always loved and respected about him.
“You love it, and you know it.” He releases me the same time as Hunter, and we each take a step back, pretending we weren’t just hugging like little bitches seconds ago.
My gaze sweeps to see Haley as she waits in the doorframe of the living room, one hand resting on the wall as she offers me a small smile. Right away, I sense she’s nervous, and I can’t really blame her. She doesn’t know her part in all of this. And I can’t allow her to play the part I so badly want her to be because it goes against my damn rules.
My mother beelines toward Haley, throwing her arms around her. “Your belly has gotten even more adorable since I saw you last!” she squeals, rocking back and forth as she hugs her. “My Lord, you must be the cutest pregnant person I ever did see.”
Haley’s cheeks turn crimson red, and she giggles awkwardly. “Oh, I don’t know about all that.” Her lips pull to the side a little.“I officially can’t wear any of my own clothes besides my sweats and leggings. And even those pinch my stomach.”
“Well then, I guess it’s time to go get maternity clothes!” my mom cheers. “I’m sure they’ve come a long way since I had Cade. They were so ugly back then. Now, pregnant women are so stylish and chic.” She stops, her eyes growing wide. “Wait a second. Don’t y’all find out tomorrow what this little bean in here is?”
“I’m no expert, but that ain’t no bean anymore,” Hunter says sarcastically, nodding toward his sister’s stomach, which looks like half of a watermelon.
Haley throws a death glare his way, putting her hand on her hip when my mother steps back. And when my parents aren’t looking, she gives him the middle finger.
In her letters, she wrote about how she felt like a “blob of jelly” because she was in that awkward stage where she wasn’t hugely pregnant, but looked “chubby,” but truth be told, I don’t think she’s ever looked more beautiful. And that’s saying something because Haleyalwaystakes my breath away.
“Haley baby, as always, you look stunning,” I say, smiling at her. “And, yeah, Mom, we’re finding out tomorrow. So, I wanna know, what are y’all’s predictions?” I look around the room. “Everyone who thinks it’s a boy, raise your hand.”
My dad and Watson both raise their hands.
I look at Hunter. “You want a niece, Thompson?”
“Nah, but I read somewhere that you puke your guts out with a girl. And Haley threw up every single day up until a few weeks ago.” He grimaces. “Dude, she threw upduringa hockey game. On someone’s fucking shoes.”
“Shut your mouth,” she hisses. “We are so not talking about that.”
I try to smile, but the truth is, it sucks to hear that she was sick and I wasn’t here for her. And it blows even more that whileI was away, life went on. It didn’t stop just because I was gone. And I guess that’s a tough pill to swallow.
Wow. Bad reference for a dude fresh out of rehab.
“Well, Ma, you told me once that you threw up every single day for, like, your entire pregnancy, and last I checked, I don’t have a vagina,” I deadpan, looking at Haley and winking. “Otherwise, how would I have put that baby in there?”
My mother puts her hand over her face, and my dad chuckles. Haley … well, her cheeks just catch on fire a little bit more.
“Yep, there he is. He’s back,” Watson mutters before punching my arm. “Missed you, big guy.”
I know exactly what he means by that. I’ve always been the funny one. The one who jokes around and makes people laugh. Floats through life, taking nothing seriously. Drugs will pull out every single piece of you that is lovable and leave you an empty shell. It feels good to be me again. Well, partially me. The rest will come with time, I’m sure.
“Yeah, well, someone’s gotta loosen up you two sticks in the mud,” I say lightly. “Might as well be me, I s’pose.”
I’d be lying if I said being home isn’t making me extremely anxious. And I guess the biggest reason why is because I feel bad for how much I hurt everyone I love the last time I was here. I’m not afraid of relapsing because I know deep down, I won’t. I have a baby on the way. And I have a girl to win over.
It’ll take some time, but when I’m one year sober, I’m getting my girl back. And when she’s finally mine, I’ll never do anything to mess that up again.
Haley
After hugging me good-bye, Cade’s parents head outside with him trailing behind. Through the window, I see his mom hug him tightly, the look of nervousness evident on her face. I know she’s scared to leave him, and I don’t blame her.
But when she hugged me good-bye, she whispered, “Look after him.”
And that’s something I plan to do. As best as I can—without overstepping, of course.
