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She lifts her red tinged eyes to look at me. “Why did you push me away?”
My stomach turns, remembering how many times I ignored her. “I wanted to forget that he was gone and you didn’t.”
She rubs her face again. “It’s because I’m afraid.”
“Of what?”
Sadie isn’t the type to be afraid of things. She came out of the womb running.
“I’m afraid of forgetting him.” She takes a deep breath. “He was a part of me, and we were so close that, when I closed my eyes, I could see and hear him so vividly. But with every day that passes, his face and voice fade more and more. I’m scared he’s going to fade away completely, and I’ll be all alone.” She looks away.
Deserting her only made everything worse for the both of us. I rest my head on her shoulder. “I’m sorry I wasn’t a better friend. I promise, from now on, I won’t let you be alone. I’ll stay by your side like a leech. You’ll have to pry me away to ever get some alone time.”
She half laughs through her tears.
“And I know I’m not Ethan, but maybe if you squint a little–”
“You’ve officially lost it,” she says.
I chuckle. I needed this. I needed her. “Sadie, are we good?”
She takes a deep breath. She pauses for what feels like an eternity. “We will be.”
The storm inside me calms. She’s practically an extension of me, like a limb. When she’s gone, everything else suffers too. She rests her head on mine, and we sit there in silence.
“So, are you going to tell me what happened this weekend?” she asks.
I groan.
“That bad, huh?”
“Picture a rollercoaster crashing and burning.”
She sucks in a breath. “Yikes.”
“My parents are separating. Dad’s an alcoholic. I broke up with Caleb.”
She sits up as her jaw drops. “You’re kidding.”
“Nope.”
She grimaces. “And here I am complaining about a math test. I’m so sorry. I had no idea.”
I set down my ice cream and hug my knees. “It’s been a lot.”
She wraps an arm around me. “Why in the world did you break up with Caleb?”
I sigh. “It’s complicated.”
She narrows her eyes. “Answer rejected. Try again.”
I roll my eyes. “That’s how it’s going to be?”
“Since when have I ever let you get away with anything? I know you too well to let something like this slide.”
“My dad was trying to drive while he was drunk. Caleb tried to stop him, but Dad pushed him, and he hit his head.”
She crosses her arms. “And?”
