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“I don’t know how,” I admitted sheepishly, regretting the words as they left my mouth. Now he was going to think I was into it—worse,shewas going to think I was.
“I’m sure you canfigure it out.”
I glanced at Tarryn. As dazed as she was, she was watching what transpired between us. The idea of doing this was strange enough, but doing it in front of her—letting another man dominate me in front of the woman I had been dominating forever—that was a completely different story. What if I did this and we could never go back to the way we were? What if I did this and she saw me differently forever?
You did this to yourself, jackass.
I wished he would overpower me—yank me closer, not give me a choice. It would give me an excuse. His look of patient expectation was enough, and I was ashamed of not wanting to fight him harder.
I closed my eyes.
“Ah, ah,” he admonished. “Keep those pretty eyes on me.”
Fuck, this was humiliating. Hot, but humiliating.
Hesitation was only prolonging the inevitable.
I leaned in and licked the head of his cock, tasting my wife on the thick head of it. Her taste was so gratifyingly familiar it was like a trick he was playing, masking himself with her taste and scent to make me forget what he was making me do.
No. What I was doing with very little prompting.
I dragged my tongue over him again, trying to keep my eyes locked on his, realizing only then how difficult it was to do. How did Tarryn make it look so easy? So sexy?
I had a fleeting thought that I should ask her later, but the idea of requesting blowjob pointers from my submissive wife was surreal.
“Good boy,” he rasped. “Now take me in your mouth.”
I bristled, glared, offended that he would refer to me as a boy. We had to be nearly the same age. Because of the language I used with my submissive, about her being a good girl, it hit too close to home.
“Open for me. Wider now. Perfect.”
I hated myself as he flexed his hips and pushed the head of his cock inside. It felt huge in my mouth, and I tried not to gag. He took my jaw in his hands and stroked it, closing my reluctant lips around him.
“Now suck, Valor. Make me feel good with that pretty, slutty mouth.”
I felt my cheeks warm, embarrassed, and turned on, feeling like a teenager experimenting back when everything was new.
Hell, thiswasnew.
Self-consciously, I sucked, giving him what I liked. Then I remembered to listen to his body the way I used to coach Tarryn to do for me. He leaned back against the footboard. Was he looking for support from the furniture because it was good, or was he bored with my fumbling attempt? How many men had he done this to? He was too confident, his gaze unwavering on mine as though he were controlling me with his mind. It was more difficult to do than I thought it would be, and I had an embarrassingly shallow gag reflex, but his hips stirred and he eventually directed me more firmly with his handful of my hair, his grip half erotic and half cruel. He pushed deeper, crooning to me.
“That’s right, pretty. Open your throat.”
It was humiliating, and I hated it, and I hated him as he made me gag and drool. My eyes felt red, and I hoped like hell I wasn’t crying. It was only my physiological reaction to being so close to puking so many times, right? How did Tarryn bear this? When we were young and I was training her, I’d always teased her for being a baby about it. Loïc quickly taught me more respect for her—for what I’d put her through, and for what she’d learned to do for me.
How could I be giving a guy a blowjob and yet falling more in love with my wife every minute?
My jaw hurt. My tongue was sore.
He pulled me off him before he came, but I could feel the tension in his body. His orgasm had been close, and I was unreasonably proud of myself for achieving that much. He was going to get up and finish off in Tarryn, or maybe come on her tits. That would be hot. My jaws hurt, but my hair hurt more as he tugged me to my feet.
He let go and unbuttoned my jeans as I stood there, staring at him, frozen in surprise.
Oh…he probably felt like he owed me a blowjob now. Having a guy blow me was a weird idea, but it made sense that this would be reciprocal.
He shoved down my jeans, and I waited for him to notice the wet mess from when I’d come in them—maybe to mock me for it. Damning precum was dripping from my dick.
“All of it off.”
