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“Maybe we did knock you up.”
“Oh, shut up.” She laughed. “Stop saying that. You seriously think the two of you double-teamed my birth control shot and conquered it? That’s not a thing. Fuck, Loïc would never stop gloating.”
“He asked me to help get you pregnant the night he showed up at my business meeting with Michael.”
“That idea has become an obsession with him lately.” She laughed. “You didn’t tell me he showed up at one of your meetings. Was it at your office again?”
“No. You know Michael.”
“Another strip club, huh? Should I be jealous?”
“Nah. They’re still not my thing. If I was going to enjoy watching someone dance and take their clothes off, it would be you.”
“And Loïc?”
My ears went hot. “I’m not bi.”
“No. You have a crush on Loïc,specifically.”
“It’s not a crush! Besides, he’s…Loïc. I don’t think he counts, does he?”
“How can he not count?”
“I don’t know. He’s more like a force of nature than a man. You can’t blame a guy for being attracted to that.” I shrugged helplessly. If anyone understood that feeling, it was my gorgeous wife. “I hope you’re over this stomach thing by the time he gets back.”
“I have no idea where he is or when he’ll be back.” She shrugged. “For all I know, he’s hiding in the crawlspace, listening to this conversation.” Her smile still looked green around the edges. “I’ll have to warn him to go away when he gets here, in case I’m contagious.”
“He’ll be convinced you’re pregnant.”
“Lord knows he’s stocked the cupboard with enough pregnancy tests to supply a college campus for a year.”
We stared at each other through the connection, and I could see her mind had headed down the same rabbit hole as mine.
“The shot isn’t a hundred percent effective.” I couldn’t stop myself from saying it. The only reason I knew was because I’d looked it up the night Loïc had texted me from her phone, trying to convince me she was carrying their child.
Her eyes held a flicker of doubt. It was enough to send me into a tailspin of anxiety.
What was wrong with me? It wasn’t like we were still minors and newlyweds. Each of us could easily afford to support a child, even if we got wildly extravagant about it, but somehow it felt no different than the times we’d had pregnancy scares when we were young and broke.
She shrugged nonchalantly, but I could tell she was anxious now, too, on top of feeling sick.
“If you have tests in the closet, why not take one?” I swallowed. My heart was drumming faster than it should be. My growling stomach had shut up.
“Even if I am, it’s not the end of the world, right?” Her gaze was wide and pleading.
“I wanted to be living together again first, but we’d figure it out.” I smiled in what I hoped looked like reassurance rather than nausea.
She got up and brought the phone with her to the linen closet, then turned the camera so I could see into it. Sure enough, an entire shelf was jammed with pregnancy tests, all different types—some of them American, and some Czech.
“Did he bring those over all at once, or was it gradual?”
“Sometimes he breaks in, makes me food, leaves pregnancy tests, and disappears into the ether.”
“To be honest, I’m surprised he doesn’t drop them off at my place, too, just to make sure his bases are covered.”
“Are you worried he might get you pregnant, too?” She waggled her brows.
“No. Not even Leduc could get me pregnant.”
