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I crawled on top of him, straddling his waist and resuming our frenzy as if I had nothing to lose.
Did I have something to lose?
Do you feel lucky to be alive?
I hate you, I hate you.
I love you.
I will rip this world apart until I can place you in the sky myself, princess.
It had to stop. I had to stop this.
My mind raced through memories of him and my heart pounded just as wickedly. What in the Saints was I doing?
Do you feel lucky to be alive?
I didn’t think. I couldn’t. I could only act. I reached down to my thigh, where the same dagger that Malachi had gifted me on our wedding night was strapped, and pulled it out.
And I pressed it to his throat.
Malachi stilled beneath me, a sudden cool breeze slicing the heat between us.
“Jade,” he said carefully. “What are you doing?”
I knew I couldn’t kill him. We both knew.
But I needed to do something. Anything. He deserved it. Hedeservedto pay for what he had done to me.
I hate you.
“Jade,” he said again when I didn’t reply. His hands were out in surrender at his sides. “I know you are angry. I know I deserve this. I deserve worse than this, trust me.”
I realized then that tears streamed down my face, dripping one by one onto his bare chest.
“No,” I muttered through gritted teeth. “You deserve…you deserve…”
I couldn’t finish the thought. Whatdidhe deserve? He had saved my life. He was my savior and yet he was also my captor.
I was lost. I was incredibly, irrevocably lost.
I dropped the dagger, letting it fall onto the bed next to us.
And I cried.
“Oh, Jade,” Malachi said, bringing his hands to my face and wiping my tears.
He sat up, wrapping his arms around me and holding me to his chest.
I cried for Tessa, for the pain she had gone through. I cried for my father. I cried for Malachi, for everything he deserved and everything he didn’t.
And I cried for myself.
Do you feel lucky to be alive?
The truth was, I didn’t feel much of anything at all.
CHAPTER8
