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By the time I had her changed and got her into a new set of pajamas, Destiny was already falling asleep in my arms. A quick glance at the clock showed it wasn’t super later, but a bottle would probably help along with another dose of pain meds. Besides the dirty diaper, I was sure her mouth was hurting her too, by the way she was gnawing on her fingers.
“Someone had an accident and is hurting,” I said, stepping into the hall. “I thought I’d fix her a small bottle and get her some meds to help her out.”
When Posey didn’t answer, confusion filled me. I hadn’t been gone that long. Less than five minutes, to be exact. Had something happened? Stepping into the living room, the reality slapped me in the face. Not only was the living room empty, but Posey didn’t even say goodbye. I glanced at Destiny; sure, I was mistaken. Perhaps she was in the kitchen, cleaning up our mess, but no water was running, nor were there any dishes clanking together as they went into the dishwasher.
“What the fuck?”
Chapter 8
Posey
Ipulled away from the curb when Destiny’s bedroom light clicked off. Leaving behind both Hunter and the couch we almost had sex on had been hard. I’d promised I’d stay and the moment he turned his back on me, I ran like the chicken shit I was.
Regrets... I had more than a few.
Or maybe I was just having some existential crisis. Or a mid-life crisis. Only problem with the last one was, I hadn’t even turned thirty yet and was nowhere near mid-life.
I left—okay, okay; I ran—because I knew, if I’d stayed, I’d have had sex with the Viking God. Like deep down in the pit of my stomach. I wasn’t ready for it—him. I mean, I was, especially if it was with Hunter, but the ramifications of doing so, not so much. I’d all but jumped him, dry humping his cock like there was no tomorrow.
I shuddered in remembrance, still turned on.
Then he left. To get take care of Destiny, and his lack of presence or force in the room meant the wheels inside of my crazy head started spinning. I had a hundred different things running through my mind. The most important one, though; Hunter was the parent of a child I’d sworn to protect. I was acutely aware once I crossed that line, there was no coming back.
I got scared, and I wasn’t sure I could do it.
So, I did what I did best and ran like hell for my car. Yet, even sitting in my car, knowing I should pull away and clear my head, I ended up sitting there watching the window like a stalker.
I should’ve stayed. Had an adult conversation with the man of my dreams. I could blame it on the fact I’d been a foster kid and was constantly worried about being abandoned by those I let into my circle. However, I refused to use my childhood trauma as a scapegoat. I was a grown-ass adult. Responsible for my adult thoughts and my adult choices.
I’m such an idiot.
I knew when I stepped out that door, I would destroy whatever I was building between Hunter and me. I knew little about men, but I knew they had tons of pride. Hunter seemed to have it by the wheelbarrow full. He was going to be pissed when he came back downstairs and realized I’d left. Truth be told, he’d have every right to be, too.
I could play the woe is me game. Convince myself I was his case manager, and there’d been no sexual attraction between us. It’d be a lie, clearly. Just like I could persuade myself, Hunter was a man whore, who had sex with a twenty-year-old, got her pregnant, and abandoned both mom and kid to a life of hell.
It wouldn’t be true.
Hunter was a family man. Through my research, I’d found out he cared for his siblings before and after their parents died. He could’ve left the family and lived his life. Fuck knows he’d been old enough. He didn’t, though. Hunter stayed, providing the family with the stability they needed. He was still there for his siblings. He babysat his nephew for cripe’s sake. Probably would do the same for his niece if Jackson asked, too.
He also didn’t hesitate with Destiny. When I showed up with the baby at his front door, he didn’t even waver. He re-arranged his life to fit hers. Lots of times when I appeared at people’s doors with a child they didn’t know about, it was because they didn’t want to know. The parents were content to sign over rights and allow the child to be put into foster care.
My phone rang as I drove away, pulling myself out of my thoughts. My gut twisted when I thought it could be Hunter, but I pushed the idea aside. He wouldn’t call me. I’d have to take the first step, again, after pulling a Harry Houdini.
I slid my finger across the phone. “Hey Luce. What’s up?”
Wherever she was, it was loud. Music played in the background along with different conversation.
“I’m atFlame. I had a shitty day and didn’t want to dwell on it at my place all night. I thought I’d get a drink and something to eat at the bar. Want to join me?”
Lucy knew how to push my buttons. I had an absolute love affair with ascetics of the bar atFlame. I loved looking at all the trinkets and knick-knacks situated under all that glass. Plus, I could use my friend too, right about now.
“Sure.” I glanced at the time on the dash and told her, “I can be there in about twenty minutes.”
“Yay!” Lucy replied. “I already saved you a seat. See you soon!”
Ending the call, I tossed my phone onto the passenger seat and continued toward the freeway. The drive took less time than I thought. Usually, the drive into the city was always a little congested. As I pulled into the parking lot, I frowned. It never ceased to amaze me how packed this restaurant was during the week, but once again, I thought I’d find a better spot than I had.
When I stepped inside, Mindy was minding the hostess box. While people were milling around everywhere; I smiled at the young girl, before sidestepping the station and made a left to head for the bar. It was packed too.Damn.Lucy sat at the end, a vacant seat beside her where her purse sat.
