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"We do this for the money. It's called a job," Tanner said, proving he completely understood where I was coming from.
"I know!" I said. "I just want a chance to make myownfuture, not have some man do it for me."
"Never mind that it makes you dependent on that guy," Tanner said. "And how are you supposed to prove yourself if he's paying your way to every event?"
"But it would keep her in the seat beside him," J.D. pointed out. "Ty's kinda dumb like that."
"No shit," Tanner agreed.
I just pushed out a heavy breath. "Yeah, but we couldn't really talk about it. Not at the arena."
"Where anyone might hear that she's notyourgirlfriend," J.D. clarified.
"Fuck!" Tanner huffed. "No, that makes sense. I mean, shit. Cody, you don't have to worry about taking care of me like that, ok?"
"Yeah, but Austin was spreading rumors that you're gay," I reminded him.
"And now the whole world has seen me kiss you," he countered. "I think I'm good. Even if things blow up, it's pretty clear I'm not gay. Don't get me wrong, I don't want you to dump me, but I also understand if it's easier."
"Not dumping you," I assured him. "Shit, I wasn't even really meaning to dump Ty, but he wasn't listening. I told him to back off, and he starts talking about some fan raping me or some shit. Like, he was on some kind of testosterone high. I said I couldn't do this, and he asked if I was dumping him, and it just kinda happened."
"Is that what you want?" Tanner pressed.
This time, J.D. was silent. He sat across from us with his hands clasped in his lap, and his eyes were jumping between me and Tanner. I got the impression he was letting Tanner lead, but also hanging on my every word. But Tanner's question wasn't an easy one.
"What I want is for none of this to have happened," I said softly.
"But it did," Tanner reminded me. "So what are you going to do, Cody? Do we track down Ty so you can beg him to come back? Do you want to say fuck it and move on? Drink it away? Watch movies and pretend like you're not in your own life for a couple of hours?"
I huffed out a laugh. "Do you know all the girly tricks for dealing with a breakup or something?"
"Actually, those are my tricks." His pretty hazel eyes found mine. "All I'm trying to say is that I get it. You liked Ty. Shit, the guy's gorgeous. He's fun, he's charming, and he's..." He gave me a shy smile. "A lot of man."
"A good bull rider too," I added, since that was another thing I'd liked about Ty. We'd been able to talk about the one thing that mattered most to me. "But I'm not going to ignore that crap, Tanner. I mean, how can I respect myself if I'm letting him walk all over me? I keep saying it, and I would've thought Ty had heard me, but I didn't come here to get ridden. I'm not a buckle bunny, and I wasn't looking for a boyfriend."
"But you got three," Tanner said.
"And now I have two."
He shrugged with just one shoulder. "Unless you talk to him."
I just thrust a hand at the room beside ours. "He left. Clearly he doesn't want to do any talking!"
"Or he's scared to," J.D. said softly. "I know I would be. If a woman like you said she was done with me? I'd run so fucking fast, getting outta there before you could see my tail tucked between my legs."
"Really?" I asked.
"Me too," Tanner agreed.
I looked between the pair of them. "So, maybe I should at least try talking to Ty?"
"You could," Tanner said gently, "but that would mean going to the bar. I'm pretty sure he'll be trying to drink away his pain. It's what all the guys on the tour do, and Ty was always pretty predictable before you showed up."
I pressed my lips together and tried to think about that. Did I really want to see him again? Yes! Oh definitely yes. But I wanted to see him in a good way, to at least talk this out, and make it clear I still liked him - and that I wasn't a doormat.
"What if he doesn't want to see me?" I asked.
"Then we'll be there to distract you and buy you as much whiskey as you can keep down," J.D. told me. "Cody, I ain't goin' nowhere. Not now, not ever."
