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Somehow, I don’t know the level of doggedness that comes over me, but it enables me to keep my body going.
I look as bright as ever when I step out. No one notices a thing.
Thank goodness for makeup.
It was one of the coping skills I had learned to do for myself ever since I became the company's new CEO in my father's stead.
All through the time I am with the team, my body constantly tells me to stop, take it down a notch, and rest, but I pay it no heed.
I kept telling myself that this would be the last time and that I'd take a long break after this one.
It's only when somewhere within when we are exploring the land and mentally mapping out factions of where what would be that I realize this wouldn’t be the last time.
It comes to me when I remember a task I’m supposed to complete.
I make a mental note to myself to do so when I get back instead of sleeping.
There'd never be rest for me, would there?
It’s a reality that terrifies me more and more every day, and today was my breaking point.
As soon as I get back to my hotel suite, I don’t even wait to walk over to the bed.
With my back against the door, I slide down to the ground onto my ass and burst into tears.
Why am I crying?
I’m not sad, not necessarily depressed.
Ending my marriage was a good thing, and I've never felt happier about that decision.
My father died about a year ago, and I’ve gotten over the grief.
So why am I crying?
I’m tired. I’m tired, and there’s no escape.
The tears flow steadily from my eyes, and the sobs keep escaping my mouth until every part of me is too weak to even cry.
I fall asleep right there on the floor, not out of necessity but out of preference. It's a completely different zone than I've ever been in, so the sleep is oddly satisfying.
Oh, and luckily for me, I sleep long.
It was around4:00 p.m. on Saturday when I closed my eyes. By 11:00 AM on Sunday, I had to hurry to meet up with everyone at the meeting because I had literally slept that long.
Nearly twenty hours of sleep is an uncontested record, which is probably the best gift life has given me so far.
I know I won’t be beating it anytime soon.
I get to the meeting, which was being held in the conference room in the hotel.
Here, we resumed our life of meaningless haggles and arguments that would all draw to one conclusion that could be derived through being straight forward.
Thomas does his usual rounds of displaying hatred for me, telling everyone with sarcasm how incompetent I am as the CEO.
It never really used to bother me, but today, being well-rested, I realize the only reason it never bothered me is because I was usually too tired to talk back.
I guess I should say something now once and for all.
