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Because thinking like that wasn’t going to get me anywhere.
It wasn’t going to get my Luca back.
It wasn’t going to make me happy again.
It wasn’t going to do anything.
How did I know?
Because I’d allowed myself a lot of hope in the very beginning.
I’d prayed.
I’d pleaded.
I’d begged.
Nothing had brought him back.
Nothing.
I was still here.
And he wasn’t.
And the longer he stayed away, the harder it started to hit me.
Luca wasn’t coming home.
He was gone.
For good.
“And for you?” the waitress asked Riel.
I flicked my eyes over to watch her face and got mad all over again.
She wouldn’t look Riel in the eyes.
She also wouldn’t look at his face.
It was more than obvious that she was looking at a point over his shoulder.
I gritted my teeth and fisted my hands to stop myself from saying or doing anything that might
cause her to spit in my food.
“I’ll have a steak. Sixteen ounces.” He paused. “Corn and a salad.”
“Dressing?” she asked.
“Umm, ranch?”
I looked at him. “You getting the ranch? You’re sure?”
He frowned.
I looked at the waitress. “Maybe put the ranch on the side. Also, bring him Italian dressing as
