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I grunt. “That’s a shame. Sean was a good man. The best.”
“The best man. I get it. You mean that he was the opposite of Ross.”
“He doesn’t even spend time with Alex, his nephew.”
“I always thought that was odd. Sad. Ross’s loss. The kid is probably better off.”
“Nora got lucky. Nathan, her steady boyfriend, is a good guy. I wouldn’t be mad if they got married.”
“Is that up to you?”
“No, of course not, but Sean asked me to...” I trail off.
Part of me hopes that the conversation puts Lally to sleep. I don’t want to think about the loss that haunts me to this day. Over the years, I’ve abruptly said goodbye to a lot of good men, friends, and brothers—thankfully, not my biological brothers. It stings every time. But Sean was different. We would’ve been best men at each other’s weddings. Our wives would’ve been best friends. Our kids would’ve grown up together.
In one terrible instant, everything changed. I changed.
“So now I know what brought you here...what about before that?”
“I was in the military.”
“I gathered.”
“You met Romy in college. I don’t mean any disrespect to either of you, but how do I put this? You seem more mature.”
“Do you mean older? You know, in the South, it’s not polite to ask a woman her age.” A hint of laughter lifts her voice.
“I didn’t ask your age. But you’re different than her...and the rest of the bridal party from what I’ve seen.”
“Do you mean I stick out like a sore thumb?”
“No, not a fat thumb either.”
Once more a smile plays on my lips because this feels a little like flirting. The relative darkness brings some courage, but would I say these things even if the light were on? Could I?
The flare in my chest suggests the answer is yes. And before the red flag lifts to caution me, Lally interrupts my interior thoughts.
“You’re not wrong. I’m in my mid-thirties, they’re in their late twenties. I decided to become a veterinarian later on. Ross called you a flyboy, so I take it you’re a pilot. Plus, the hair, the stance, the commanding presence.”
“The stance?”
“Your posture. It’s specific. I recognize it.”
I thought I lost all that when I retired.
When I don’t say more, Lally’s voice floats to me in the darkness. “To bring this full circle, just before I met Ross, I made a plan to say yes after being told no numerous times. I called it my summer of yes. I made the mistake of saying yes to him.”
“Did he propose?”
“No, but I said yes to testing the waters of a relationship after—” She goes quiet.
“We’ve all been there.”
“Not like this.”
No, not like this. I started my military career as a grunt and worked my way up to flying fighter jets, running helo missions into war-torn areas, then graduating to special forces... but nothing prepared me for this tumult inside.
These unidentifiable inner objects. It’s like Lally entered the hotel room of my heart even though theNo Vacancysign flashes brightly.
