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“She’s safe,” Ryan says.
“But is she your fiancée?” Royal asks.
“No, I should probably focus on—” I wave my hand toward the cottages.
“Is that what Sean would’ve wanted?” CJ asks.
“You guys don’t understand. That could’ve been me.”
“No, brother. We are well aware,” Royal says.
“I know you guys wrestled with the fact that I could’ve fallen in the line of duty. I meant stress, depression, any of it could take me out at any time.”
My three brothers, formidable in their own right, stand shoulder to shoulder. Royal had a point. Never thought of it from their side.
The words Lally said about leaning on friends, family, and God come to mind along with my strategy not to let anyone get too close or else I’d risk hurting them. She was right about that. Spotted it early on, from two klicks away. That woman amazes me.
I broke up with Wanda and didn’t get into any serious relationships, devoting myself to the missions because I was afraid if something happened to me, they’d wind up alone.
Turns out I’m the one who’s alone, and by distancing myself, she’s alone anyway.
But I’m secretly afraid that if I seal the deal with Lally and something happens as it did with Sean...
As if they can read my mind, my brothers speak in turn.
“You’re being dumb.”
“Stupid.”
“Foolish.”
Chip’s letter, sent long ago when I was in Ramadi, urged me toward companionship in some fashion, but he didn’t specify humans. I have the dogs.
Unmoving and unyielding, my brothers remain standing there. A strong wall of men. Strong enough to see me through this moment of weakness.
“You haven’t been the same since the spider bite,” Royal says.
I nod because I’ve thought the same thing.
“I think we got the diagnosis wrong,” Ryan says. “Mag is lovesick.”
Royal’s eyebrows shoot up. “Lally is a vet.”
“I’m not a dog,” I practically bark.
“The symptoms are the same,” Ryan says.
Royal shakes his head. “No, I meant a veteran. So are you. That means she’s going to understand whatever is going on in that thick head of yours probably more than anyone.”
I flip my hands upward. “She wasn’t a combat veteran. It’s different.”
“Everyone has a battle out there. She’s been with plenty of people in their last moments. She’s saved lives. Lost a lot too, probably. Your relationship isn’t a live human, but it is worth fighting for,” CJ says with surprising intensity.
Everything they’ve said reaches me, loud and clear. But the message I receive is actually one I need to send.
I thank my brothers, tell them I’m going to be brave, and pull out my phone.
Lally
