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I also wasn’t about to admit that yes, Nikolai was so big, so attractive that my body felt like it was short circuiting whenever I thought about him, that I felt arousal I’d never experienced before.
That I feared and anticipated in equal parts what would happen tonight.
I noticed my father dancing with my mother, both of their postures stiff and clearly uncomfortable. I couldn’t find Nikolai, but Dmitry and the other Russians stood around a table drinking and laughing, and I could see the way their gazes scanned the room, as if they were waiting for something to happen, hoping they could cause mayhem if it did.
Tommaso was across from where my mother and father danced. I couldn’t find Edoardo, but I was thankful for that. I was tired of him being my second shadow.
I blinked back to the present and looked at Auna and Selena, who were still thoroughly involved in their conversation about my husband.
“If you’ll excuse me,” I murmured and started heading toward the main ballroom doors without waiting for their reply.
I suddenly had crushing pressure on my chest and picked up my pace.
I smiled and nodded as people tried to stop me, congratulated me and wished me well. I expected Nikolai or my father to try and stop me, to usher me back to the oppressing suffocation of being surrounded by all these people.
But no one stopped me. No one tried. And the closer I got to the double doors that led to the hotel hallway, the more that pressure kept growing. I felt hot, beads of perspiration dotting my temples.
When I finally made it through the open double doors and away from the sound and lights, the noise, I took a deep breath in and felt that dizziness that was circulating around me fade
I was walking down the hall and rounding the corner before I realized I made the trek, but I didn’t stop. My feet went over the plush carpet silently, my fingers tight around the lace of my dress. And when I rounded another corner that’s when I stopped and leaned back against the wall. I rested my head back and closed my eyes.
Just breathing.
The sounds of the wedding had faded so I barely heard anything, just the steady beat of my heart, the rush of blood through my veins as it filled my ears. And it stayed like that for several long minutes until a feminine sigh, a little moan broke my contentment.
I blinked my eyes open and lifted my head to look down the hallway where the noise had come from. Then I heard it again, that female sound that was clearly from pleasure. It was followed by a gruff male grunt. Then matching harsh breathing.
I was moving toward it before I knew what was happening. The door I stopped in front of was partially open, just a sliver of a crack allowing me to see into the darkened room. The window off to the side allowed blue-hued moonlight to filter in and show me two bodies pressed against a large couch.
“Are you going to give it all to me?”
I felt my heart race. I knew that voice.
“Come on. Just pull that dress up and let me.”
Edoardo.
This felt wrong, and not just because I was watching something very private.
“Oh Edoardo. I love you.”
I slapped a hand over my mouth to still the sound of my shocked gasp when I heard Francesca.
“I want you,” she whispered. There was the sound of clothes ruffling, a zipper being pulled down, and then Edoardo grunted, Faces gasped, and I took a step back.
“That’s it. Yeah, that’s it.”
And then the very distinct sound of them having sex filled my ears.
“I love you Edoardo. God I love you.”
I stumbled back, my heel getting caught on the end of my dress. My arms flung out as I tried to right myself, my backhitting the wall loud enough all sounds ceased. I should have hurried away but I was frozen in place when I heard hushed, frantic whispers.
And then the door was opening and Edoardo was coming out, gun in hand, eyes frantic and crazed. His gaze locked on me and his eyes seemed to darken before his eyebrows pulled down in a scowl.
“Go back to the party.”
I knew he wasn’t speaking to me even though his focus was trained on my face. A moment later Francesca was slipping past him, her body freezing as she caught sight of me, her eyes widening.
