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Even so, I need to make some calls. Just because Matthew wasn’t hurt this time doesn’t mean someone won’t be in the next attack. Because therewillbe a next attack.
I’d stake my life on it.
9
ORPHEUS
I wake to the sound of someone moving around the kitchen. There’s absolutely no reason for me to expect it to be Eurydice, but even after nearly a year apart, I would know her soft footfall anywhere. Part of me wants to lie here with my eyes closed and prolong the moment before this all comes crashing down on me.
She may have been hesitant to see the back of me last night, but that was an emotional moment, and I had just shown up when she didn’t expect me. I’d be a fool to hope that maybe she misses me even a fraction as much as I miss her.
Iama fool.
Still, it’s better to get this over with. I sit up and climb to my feet. The kitchen is down the hall from the living room where I spent the night, so I follow the sounds of Eurydice puttering until I find my way.
I stop in the doorway and allow myself to drink in the sight of her. She looked good last night, of course. This morning she’s like something out of a dream. Sunlight filters in through the window, givingthe room an almost dreamlike quality. She’s wearing an oversized T-shirt that must belong to Charon. It dwarfs her, but it only hits the tops of her thighs, leaving her long light-brown legs bare. I’m strangely delighted to discover she’s painted her toenails a bright yellow.
I clear my throat to let her know that I’m here, but she doesn’t even flinch. She just glances over her shoulder and gives me a tight smile. “Morning.”
“Morning.” I don’t know what else to say. Do I apologize again? Do I turn around and quietly leave? The thought of doing the latter makes my feet feel as if they are filled with concrete. I don’t care if she hates me, just as long as I don’t have to leave her presence. Selfish. I’m so fucking selfish. Apparently I haven’t learned anything at all.
Eurydice doesn’t say anything else. It takes me a few seconds to realize what she’s doing, and I take a step into the kitchen without thinking about it. “Pancakes?”
“I was in the mood.”
This is so fucking awkward. It feels so good and yet hurts so badly, all at the same time. I find myself speaking without thinking it through. “I know coming back around has complicated things for you. I’m sorry. If you and Charon are—”
“Me and Charon have nothing to do with this.” She sets the bowl on the counter with a little more force than necessary. “He’s giving me the space to do what I need in order to get over you.”
It feels like she just reached out and punched me in the stomach. “What do you need in order to get over me?”
“If I knew, that would make things so much easier.” She sighs. “Charon had some suggestions.”
Every word out of her mouth is a knife between my ribs, and yet I never want her to stop. At least she’s talking to me. “What did he suggest?” I find myself asking.
Her lips twist, and for moment I think she won’t answer me. But then she says, “He said he doesn’t care if I put a collar on you and walk you like a dog, fuck you, or sleep with you. That he and I are endgame.”
That strange feeling from last night is back, compounding in my chest until I can barely breathe past it. I hardly feel like myself as I sink to my knees before her. “Do it.”
“What are you talking about?” She flutters her fingers at me. “Orpheus, get off the ground.”
“I’m not saying you should fuck me. I would never presume after everything that happened.” Even if I want her so desperately, it feels like I’ve been cursed, possessed, or have some kind of otherworldly influence over me. Maybe all three. I tap the front of my throat. “But if you want to collar me, I’m more than willing to pay penance that way.”
“Orpheus, don’t be ridiculous.”
“He’s not being ridiculous.”
We both jump at Charon’s voice. I hadn’t heard him come in, and from the way Eurydice’s eyes go wide, neither did she. She crosses her arms over her chest. “I don’t care what you said last night—”
“Look at him, baby.” Charon crosses the kitchen in slow steps that I don’t hear but I can feel nonetheless. His big hand lands on the back of my neck. “If you’re not going to set him free, then exorcise him.”
“He’s aperson.” But her gaze drops to the point where his fingers curl around my throat.
“No one’s saying he isn’t. You’ve spent enough time in the club to know better.” There’s a dangerous edge in Charon’s voice, but I don’t know him well enough to divine its source. He’s not gripping me tightly at all, just letting me feel the weight of him while all his attention is on Eurydice, but I can’t stop shivering.
I’ve messed around with kink in the past, but it never really did it for me. Bondage can be fun, and a little spanking spices things up, but that’s not what this feels like.
It feels like Charon isbrandingme. The fact that he’s doing it for her only heightens the experience. The muddied feeling that’s plagued me for so many fucking months finally clears, the clouds parting for the space of a heartbeat. I want this.
