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Her reaction gutted me. Her words made me feel ashamed of myself for the way she views me. It shouldn't matter, but for whatever reason, it does.
"And she saw the monster underneath."
He smiles. "Brother, you’re too hard on yourself. The female population thinks otherwise. The only monster they think you are, is when you break their heart when they want more from you. Now that you’re married, a lot of tears will be shed."
I don't want to admit that he's right. Even with my fucked-up face and eye from the car accident where I made it and my parents didn't, I have no problems finding a willing woman who would sleep with me. If anything, they like that they can't see my face, and the few who have, like Blair, think it's a turn-on.
But no one has ever told me I was gorgeous. Not after the accident.
No one but her.
I wasn't sure if she was pitying me or if it was genuine, but I couldn't take the chance. A woman raised under the rule of the judges on this island would never look at me twice. They would be disgusted and repulsed by my face.
I don’t want to admit I like the way she made me feel that night on the boat. It's been a week, and I still don't understand what I feel when it comes to Lillith. I'm not ready to find out either.
"Who said there will be tears shed?"
I watch his mouth turn into a frown from the corner of my good eye and hear him suck his teeth. "Yeah, man. Why would they? You married her for a purpose. She means nothing. Killian Cross. The man and the legend on the mainland doesn't have time for love."
"In this world, love kills you. If I die, I would be no good to anyone. I wouldn't be able to save the people counting on me. She'll get over it when the time comes. Lillith understands. She already caught me with Blair and Sarah three days before the wedding."
I hear the click of a buckle from his bag, and as soon as the words leave my mouth, I wish I could take them back. I shouldn't have said that. Hell, I wish that night never happened. It was fucked up she saw me with them, and I regret every moment of it.
He gets up, swinging the strap over his shoulder. "I gotta head back. You good here?"
I flatten my lips because I know he's disappointed in me. Ciro is a guy with feelings. A girl back on the mainland did a number and cheated on him. I didn’t help the situation, but I didn’t know. Ciro sleeps around but isn’t serious with anyone, but neither am I. I had to marry, but marriage means something to Ciro.
“Yeah.”
He shakes his head. “You know, come to think of it, I think bringing the priest was a bad idea. You should have just let one of those lackeys the judges hire do it."
And he walks out.
Great, now my best friend thinks I'm an asshole.
Isit on the rocks, watching the waves crashing down below like a sledgehammer leaving white foam in its wake. The sun sets on the horizon while the waves ripple gently like it was pulsing under the streams of orange light of the sun. It feels hot and then the wind blankets a peaceful coolness on my skin. The perfect balance.
Not too hot.
Not too cold.
Behind me is a dark mansion with concrete walls and bright neon lights lining the floor like a fortress under the shadows. A direct contrast to the light.
When I look to my right, there is the dock where the electronic lifts hold two stealth-looking boats. The shiny black tops of the solar panels reflect the light coming from the sun.
To my left is the view of the City of God. Tall skyscrapers with dark tinted windows reaching far into the sky. No light pollution. The air smells purified, but it is all an illusion because where it may seem to be a sense of peace, I know the truth.
People may view the island as their savior. Their goal the government convinced them to achieve. Ultimate fulfillment to be disease and problem-free.
But even hell can mirror the kingdom of God. People began to rely on the advancement of technology to solve all their problems. It seems like the answer until it controls you.
A place created by a government showing humanity the error of their ways in order to correct the damage done to the planet. They removed religion, freedom of speech, and the freedom to share information. Containing resources by putting a price on it and labeling it with rules.
Churches were condemned. People were banned from practicing any form of religion because it didn't conform to ideals. Presidents and governments were removed to form a new government. A government where members did not need any form of monetary help to create a new order.
Selling promises to the rest of the human population, knowing that under the new system, people on the mainland who lived to work could never reach the island without sacrifice.
Women who didn’t fit natural ideals of what was beautiful could never live here because they were deemed impure by the wealthy. No alteration of the human flesh was allowed because their offspring would not be given the same traits.
