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If this trulywasa map, I had a feeling I needed my magic to read it. Now that the malarite was scrubbed from my skin and my collar was gone, I closed my eyes and tried to grasp at theinvisible thread that I hoped still tied me to my kana, despite what Krish had said. I started by focusing on my heart, feeling for a familiar warmth or tingling. I let my desire to be free stretch like a grasping hand deep into my being. For a moment, my heart fluttered, and my nerves tingled, but just as quickly, I felt myself hit a wall.
No magic.
My body felt like a dried-up riverbed. I blinked back tears of frustration.
Crying is not going to help you figure this out, Raven.I wasn’t sure if that was Hen’s voice or my own. I took a few deep breaths and began to hum softly to keep the tears at bay. It was my tendency to sing whether I was happy or sad or even scared. My lost memory might have stolen the verses of the song in my head, but humming its sweet melody always seemed to calm me. Hen had shushed me so many times in the mines so I wouldn’t attract unwanted attention. I wished more than anything she was here to scold me now.
I turned back to the map.
Skies, I wished I could talk to Sora. I was desperate to know who I was, where I came from, and who she meant by “we.”We’ve been looking for you, she’d said.We. That meant someone out there was missing me besides her. But who? Just my brother? Or maybe the rest of my family? Were my mother and father sick with worry? Did I have friends who missed me? I could only hope. For months, I’d had a constant longing forsomething, I just couldn’t remember who or what it was.
If my brother was looking for me, it must have meant that my recurring dream about him wasn’t what I feared—that Ihadn’tdone something terrible.She’ll pay for what she’s done.If he wasn’t referring to me, though, who was he talking about?
I sighed. There were too many unanswered questions.
I let my hand with the map fall back in my lap.
When I looked at the dress again, an idea came to me. Maybe dinner with Bloodbain wouldn’t be such a bad thing. I might not trust him, but Bloodbain had saved me from Lord Thrailkull, killed Meat, removed my collar, and was making sure I was fed and rested. Could I convince him to help me escape?
Maybe. I’d have to tread carefully at dinner tonight, though. I’d have to make it seem like it was in his best interest to help me. Otherwise, our current ruse might quickly turn sour.
16
Jeddak
“Let’s go over it again,” Kah said, acting like this wasn’t the blazen tenth time we’d tried to hash out this same plan.
“The plan’s as good as it’s going to get, Kah.” I was hiding out in one of the storage rooms on the lower level of the tower, trying to avoid being roped into duty with the other guards. With the Magi’s spell wearing off by tomorrow morning, tonight was our only chance to get the map from the Zavien girl.
I was ready to get on with it. After days in Malengard, I felt like a caged animal, brimming with pent-up energy. I didn’t need a perfect plan. I just needed the cage door to open so I could get what I came for and get out of here, taking down anyone who tried to stop me.
That’s probably what Kah was afraid of, though.
“Humor me,” he said.
“Fine.”
“You’re going to drug the towerguard in the tavern this evening with the sleeping herbs you bought.”
“Uh-huh.”
“Then you’ll take his place in front of the commander’s chambers,” Kah continued. “Andsomehowtrigger an explosion near Thrailkull at the same time?”
“Yep.” Except, that was the part where we were stuck. I stared at one of the pouches of herbs I’d bought from the Arden’s shop in the marketplace that Averee had told me about.Don’t linger after you throw this in the fire, or you’ll be caught in the explosion, the wrinkled Arden woman had warned.
“Then when the commander runs out at the sound of thisallegedexplosion, you’re going to find the girl and get the map from her,” Kah said.
“Yep.”
“Exactly how are you going to do that?” he asked.
“I’ll figure it out.” There was no scenario where I could envision the girl happily handing over a map leading to a stone of power, especially after what happened on the platform in the mine. I hated the idea of using force, but begging wasn’t my style. “Never underestimate my charm,” I added, flashing my most charismatic smile to irritate Kah.
He grunted. “It feels wrong to leave her behind with Bloodbain.”
I know, I wanted to say. But I forced that thought away. I couldn’t let guilt about what happened in the mine cloud my judgment. “We’ve been through this, Kah. We’d never make it past Malengard’s gates if she was with us. I won’t risk our mission. All we can do is use these keys we stole to remove her collar and hope that if the legends are true, she can turn into a bird and find her own way out.” I fiddled with the keyring as I spoke, thinking again of the drawing of the bird key from the book. None of these keys looked remotely similar.
“You know this plan has more holes than a sieve,” Kah said woodenly.
