AllFreeNovel
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“Things are great. With Tuck and Katie, at least. Mom, they’re great. Well, Tuck’s a little broody?—”
“His mama did say he takes a bit to warm up. I know helooks intimidating, but apparently he’s just a sweet cinnamon roll on the inside.”
“A cinnamon roll?” I laugh. “Maybe with his daughter. They’re adorable together.”
Dad frowns. “He not treating you right?”
“He’s been treating me just fine. He helped me unpack and then made us all dinner. It was nice.”
“Then why do you sound so down?” Mom asks.
“I don’t know. I have an exam on Friday and I’m really struggling with the material for class.” My throat tightens. “This semester just started, but it’s already been much harder than I anticipated.”
Mom tilts her head. “Did you reach out to your professor?”
“I did. She’s been great. It’s just...”I think I’m on the wrong path and I have no idea what to do with my life.
No big deal.
“I’m sorry, honey,” Mom says. “Maybe you’re just tired. What if you went to bed and then got up nice and early to study?”
My throat tightens. “I could try that, yeah.”
“You’ve crushed every class you’ve ever taken,” Dad says. “You’ll crush this one too. You’re getting your master’s degree, for goodness sake!” He laughs, looking at Mom. “Our daughter and her three degrees. Wild.”
“Two,” I correct. “I will have two degrees.”
“Two degrees, if you keep your eyes on the prize.” Mom smiles proudly. “You can do it, honey.”
The ache in my throat hurts so badly it’s making my head throb.
I understand why my parents are obsessed with me getting all this education. Dad has his bachelor’s, but Mom never went to college. She had me young—my parents’ wedding was a bit of a shotgun situation—and while she’s never, ever made me feel like a burden for showing up soearly in her life, she’s made it clear she wants something different for me.
And I get it. I appreciate it too. An education like mine means I’ll have security and opportunities Mom never did. But sometimes I wonder whose dream I’m really making come true.
Then again, I have no idea what I’d be doing if I weren’t getting my master’s. I just... there’s already so much pressure to decide where I want my life to go. I think about my future all the time. But the more I think, the more frustrated I become.
I chose a path, goddamn it, and I want it to work. I want to love school. I want to feel excited about a future in education. About any future at all where I have gainful employment—a real job, with real benefits like health insurance and a retirement plan.
Instead, I feel dead inside.
But those are dark thoughts for a Monday night, and I know my parents are exhausted from their day and don’t want to hear me moan and groan about the admittedly cushy position I’m in.
“All right, y’all, I’m gonna go.” I manage a tight smile. “I love you both.”
“Just let us know when we can visit,” Mom singsongs. “We always love an excuse to come to Bald Head.”
“Y’all come out anytime. I can’t wait for you to meet Katie. Mom, she’s hilarious. All day today she wore this koala bear costume that was just, really, the cutest thing ever.”
“Aw, she sounds like a doll. I’m glad y’all are getting along,” Dad says. “Stay in touch, you hear?”
“And get some rest so you can study and ace that test!” Mom adds.
When we hang up, I set my phone beside my laptop on the table. As much as I appreciate my parents’ advice, I’m more of a night owl than a morning person. I know if Iprocrastinate, I’m going to end up having stress dreams all night about failing this exam or not setting my alarm.
Nose to the grindstone it is.
Taking a deep breath, I grab my textbook and bring my laptop back to life. Iamgoing to ace this thing.
