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“But you of all people understand that what Ella and I have goes beyond attraction.”
“You didn’t know that at the time.”
“No, but my gut told me and I didn’t listen. Master Sachinanda said, for things to go my way, I’d have to watch my every move and scrutinize my decisions, even the small ones. He told me that if I misstepped, I could lose out for good this time around. And I have. How will I ever forgive myself?”
Claudette sighs. “Yeah, that sounds like something he’d say.”
I look at her in surprise. Ah, that’s right. I forgot that she lived at his ashram too.
“It still amazes me how all these things work out. You’d think I’d be used to these synchronicities by now, but I swear they take me by surprise every single time and steal my breath away. Isn’t it just magical?” she asks, her face alight.
I’m unmoved… well, at least not swayed to smile. “I’d feel that way if Ella was in my arms and all mine. But fate conspired against me.”
“Fate brought you together… all three of you, but the outcome wasn’t set in stone. Free will and all that. It could have gone either way… it still can.” I wish that was true.
“That’s along the lines of what Master said… just less specific. He talked about events coming my way and the need to stay vigilant. Never in a million years would I have expected it had to do with my love life.”
“You know Ella loves you, don’t you? It’s obvious to everyone,” she whispers.
“Yeah, but she loves him more,” I say, sounding broken even to myself.
Claudette shakes her head. “It’s not so much that she loves him more, but the circumstances are weighing in his favor.”
“You mean the baby? Because considering all the rest, I’m the better pick. I can make her happy and give her stability and safety. I’m not a criminal overlord.”
Claudette takes my hand again. “That’s true, but they had a chance to explore that profound connection you all share first.”
“And that’s on me, because I fucking left.” I’m back to self-loathing.
“Ade, there’s no point in going over that again. It’s done and dusted… in the past. You need to let it go and be in the here and now or you’ll miss new opportunities.”
That pricks up my ears. Does she sense what’s going to happen? She’s a psychic after all.
“What kind of new opportunities? What do you sense?”
She chuckles at my hopeful expression. “Nothing specific. I’m talking in general. When one door closes, another opens… yada yada yada.”
I roll my eyes at her.
“Do you remember Sachinanda’s favorite saying?” she asks. “The present moment is filled with infinite possibilities.He said it all the time when I was there… and he’s right.”
I don’t comment, and silence settles over our conversation. Claudette seems lost in thoughts, probably remembering the words this wise man spoke to her.
There was more he told me… but what? I close my eyes, racking my brain for morsels of memories… anything that might help me turn this around. There has to be a way. Accepting fate has never been my forte. If it was, I would have died in that cave.
Come on, come on, come on, brain… he said something else. What was it?
I picture the master sitting cross-legged on colorful blankets in his meeting hall, his orange robe glowing in the sun streaming through the windows. I hear his voice in my mind, calm and melodic.
“No matter what, you will advance on your path.”Great, but nebulous in its meaning.
And then the words I’ve been searching for emerge, the mist in my mind lifting.
“You are likely to meet a woman I know. She will help. If you reach a fork in the road, listen to her. Even if that should mean setting aside your ego.”
My eyes fly open. The movement so sudden, Claudette startles.
“What?” she asks, eyebrow raised.
