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“You go first,” I tell him just as he says, “Ladies first.”
More chuckles that are anything but heartfelt.
I bump his shoulder with mine. “Jesus, this isn’t us, Ade. You and I can always talk about anything.”
He lets out a heavy sigh. It’s laden with sorrow and regret. “I hear congratulations are in order,” he finally says, pointing at my ring finger.
My heart constricts in my chest.
The air tenses further between us with unspoken words.
“I’m sorry, Ade,” I whisper, the tears already spilling over.
He turns his body toward me, his gaze trapping me. His brown eyes, normally full of energy and mirth, seem dull and gloomy.
It’s all my fault.
The tightness in my chest grows, as does my guilt for putting him through this pain.
He slings an arm around me, pulling me against his body. I bury my face in his neck, breathing him in.
It’s for the last time.
The realization hits me like lightning, leaving me sobbing harder.
“I don’t want to say goodbye, Ade,” I manage to push out through the stream of tears and a throat that’s so tight, it’s suffocating.
A tear runs down his beautiful face, and I reach up to wipe it away with my thumb.
“Nor do I,” he admits, his voice raw and unrestrained. “I can’t imagine not seeing you every day. I always thought—” He doesn’t finish the sentence, his voice too choked to continue.
He shakes his head, burying it in my hair until he’s regained some composure. He’s doing better than me. My chest pangs with all the heart-clenching emotions swirling inside me.
Eventually, Ade speaks again, his voice quivering. “You had to make a choice. And every child deserves their father in their life.” He takes a deep breath to steady himself.“But please know, you will always be the brightest part of my life… my lucida. You might walk away from me today, and I won’t lie, my heart feels like it’s torn from my chest and put through a meat grinder.
“But your happiness is what matters most to me. I’ll take comfort in knowing that you’ll be happy.
“I can see the bond you share with him. It’s the bond we didn’t get to develop because he was there first. I’ll forever regret not having talked to you in Sicily. But that’s my burden to bear.
“If what Claudette says is true and the three of us keep finding each other lifetime after lifetime, perhaps the next one will see you and me together. I take comfort in that hope. I’ve learned my lesson, and I’m determined to seize opportunities instead of letting doubt dictate my actions.”
His eyes glass over again. He’s barely holding it together.
He stands abruptly, bending down and pressing his lips against mine.
The kiss is raw and painful… and short.
Straightening, he pierces me with one last look. “Just knowing you exist somewhere in this world after today will have to be enough… until we meet again. Know, I will always love you.”
With that, he turns and rushes out of the room, leaving me a crying mess.
“Why are the cars not by the door?” Tiero thunders. There’s an edge to his voice I don’t like.
We’ve reached the hospital’s main entrance, ready to leave this place.
Taking the next step outside these walls marks the end of my time in Canada and the beginning of a new adventure.
I have no idea where this adventure will lead me.
