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“Yeah, I can go—”
“Sierra,” he said on a breath, his back to me. “If you want my help, you have to allow me to actually help you.”
“I can carry a suitcase.”
“Yeah, well, so can I,” he replied as he turned, his hands crossed over his chest. “You just rest and try to eat something. I’ll go get it and you can get settled in.”
He grabbed my keys and left the area without another word, like he was desperate to remove himself from my presence. I couldn’t justify the anger I felt toward him at the moment. Anger that had nothing to do with how he most likely felt and everything to do with the fact I’d backed myself into a corner I couldn’t get out of.
Going back to Hot Springs a month ago had been a mistake that would affect us both for the rest of our lives. He didn’t want this baby. But I did, desperately. Maybe even selfishly, just so I could do things differently than my parents had with me.
The front door opened and shut, and then the apartment was wrapped in silence. The distance thrum of the music coming up from downstairs was only a faint vibration as I leaned back against the couch cushions and closed my eyes.
I promised myself one thing.
I wouldn’t let myself fall in love with Pete. I couldn’t hurt myself like that. I’d have this baby and I’d give him the option to decide what kind of relationship he wanted with the child, if any.
And I’d figure the rest out on my own.
Chapter Nine
Pete
The awkwardness between us ate me alive, but there was nothing I could say or do to fix the situation. I don’t know why I hadn’t just sent her to the guestroom right away. That would have been the better thing to do. I could tell she was fucking exhausted. I could also tell the fries were probably the first thing she’d eaten in a while, which grated on my nerves.
I didn’t understand her predicament at all. Sure, she didn’t want to marry this dickhead Jonas, or Jonah, whatever the hell his name was. I didn’t care. She was born with a silver spoon in her mouth and didn’t want her mommy and daddy bossing her around anymore.
And now she was pregnant, and I was the likely father. She was my responsibility and I gathered she was not accustomed to being on her own.
She was also the same girl I’d been pining over for a year and now she was sitting in my living room and I didn’t know what to say to her at all.
I felt like a chump, honestly.
So, I left her there and went out to her car to get her suitcase.
Night air wrapped around me in a wet, late summer embrace that smelled like rain. I sighed deeply and shook my head as I manually unlocked the piece of shit car she’d been driving. It leaked oil all over the street and was rusted out. How she’d managed a cross-country drive in this thing without it blowing up, I didn’t know, but she sure as hell wasn’t going to be driving it anymore. I started it up and drove it around the corner, parking it next to my truck behind the bar. I had it a mind to toss the keys down a storm drain but thought better of it.
I felt that tug of shame as I lifted her impossibly light suitcase out of the trunk and set it on the wet pavement. I fought back the intrusive thought telling me to open the suitcase to see what was inside. I didn’t think she was lying—at least, I didn’t want to think so. What if she was actually on the run from the law and the suitcase had her ex-fiancé’s head in it? Or drugs? Or was rife with cash and jewels?
I cursed under my breath and unzipped the suitcase.
“You’re a fucking dick,” I said to myself as I looked down at the meager belongings she’d hastily packed. A few shirts, sweatpants, jeans. My shirt she’d stolen was the only incriminating thing in there.
I chewed my lip as I picked up the suitcase and carried it back upstairs.
“Here you go,” I said, kicking the door closed on my way inside. Sierra poked her head around the corner to the hallway and smiled. That smile… it was killing me. I’d give anything to go back to the way things were between us before, even if that meant she just occasionally showed up in my life.
Being a parent was something I’d only thought about once or twice in my life.
And to my great shame, she’d been the one I’d envisioned the future with.
Now I could barely look at her without wanting to scream and put a hole through the wall for getting her into this position when she had so much else going on to be worried about.
“Thanks. Did you lock the car?”
“No, of course not. I’m hoping someone does us both a favor and steals it tonight.”
“Pete—”
