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She followed him into their room and stopped in the doorway. He’d already taken off his shoes, socks and his shirt. Her eyes roamed over his chest—all that smooth, warm male skin, right there. She wanted to wipe her mouth to make sure she wasn’t drooling.
“What do you want, Alison?” His gaze was almost haunted as he stared at her, his hands frozen on his belt buckle.
“Sorry. I didn't realize…” Her eyes dipped to his pants, which were suddenly tighter than before, and then back up to his face. She wanted to race across the room and jump in his arms, but she couldn’t. “I want to know why I had to come into the office while everybody else telecommuted.”
“I answered that question when you were hired. Do you want me to repeat it?”
“No, but I thought maybe there was more you wanted to say.” She was giving him a chance to be honest with her—really honest.
“Why? You don’t believe what I just told you. You won’t believe this either.”
“I might.”
“What do you want to hear? That I made you come into the office because as much as I didn’t want to be attracted to you, I couldn’t imagine going a day without seeing you. Talking to you.”
“Yeah.” That was exactly what she’d wanted to hear. She swallowed. “But is it true?”
“I don't think that matters to you. I've told you the truth over and over, but you still don't believe me. I'm done wasting my breath.” He turned and walked into the bathroom, closing the door behind him.
CHAPTER 26: Alison
The next morning, Alison got up and showered. Harker had fed Irene before he’d left for work and the baby was still sleeping.
After their argument last night he’d gone to his office. She’d fallen asleep before he’d come to bed. She headed for the kitchen. If she were lucky, she’d get to drink a cup of coffee before Irene woke. She filled her mug from the pot Harker must’ve made before he’d gone to work and carried it into the living room. She may as well get a few things done on the computer before the baby got up.
She stopped, staring at the divorce papers on her laptop. They were open to the last page and Harker’s signature was on it. She dropped onto the chair next to her computer, nerves and emotions swirling inside her like a storm. She should be happy. He’d finally given her what she wanted, but what did that mean? Did he still think she was ruining everything, or did he now agree that their marriage would never work?
Bile rose in her throat. She had no idea what she was going to do. All these months, she’d blamed him for taking away her choice, but she didn't want to choose. It was so much easier to blame him.
Irene cried and she jumped up, hurrying into the other room and away from those papers. If she filed them, this was over. Her life with Harker was done, except for seeing each other because of Irene. She wasn’t sure she was ready for that.
The rest of the day passed in spurts of normalcy followed by dread. When she was with Irene, she forgot all about the divorce papers, but as soon as she had a moment to think, they called to her from the living room like an evil presence.
She put the baby down in the playpen and turned on the mobile. She walked over to her computer, her eyes never leaving those papers. She couldn’t believe he’d signed them without saying anything to her. His name was scrawled across the signature line like it meant nothing more to him than any other business deal.
She didn’t know what she should do. He was stubborn and bullheaded, but she'd known that from the beginning. He was manipulative and competitive, and she'd known that about him too. She just hadn’t thought he’d manipulate her. She could call her mom, her aunt or Ellie, but it felt wrong getting their advice. She’d told Harker that she wanted the freedom to make this decision. The least she could do was make it on her own.
Irene started fussing and relief washed through her. She’d have to decide what to do later. Her daughter needed her. She walked toward the playpen when Harker stepped through the door. His gaze met hers for a moment before he walked over to the baby. He had dark circles under his eyes and his hair looked like he’d spent the day running his hands through it. She had no idea what to say to him because she had no idea what she was going to do.
He bent and lifted the baby from the playpen, a wide smile spreading across his handsome face. “I think someone needs her bottom changed.” He patted Irene’s soggy diaper as he walked past her toward the baby’s bedroom. “Did you eat yet?”
“No. I was going to make something but…I lost track of time. I’ll do that now.” She hurried into the kitchen and looked in the refrigerator. It was pretty empty. She searched the cabinets. There wasn’t much in there either. She pulled out a bag of rice, and cans of green beans and corn. She stared at it. This was awful—everything. All of it. The food. Her day. She blinked, trying to keep the tears from falling.
“Is everything okay?” he asked.
She jumped, turning toward him. He stood in the doorway, holding Irene.
“No. We barely have any food. How can we live like this? What are we teaching our daughter?” She walked over to him and took the baby, hugging her. Irene started fussing and rooting at her breast.
“I’d say you got her dinner covered. You feed her, and I’ll order something for us.” He pulled his phone from his pocket, his hand brushing against her hip.
Alison's heart flipped as her body heated by his simple touch.
“Hi. I’d like to place an order.” He turned away from her. “Delivery.”
He hadn’t realized that he’d touched her. He always noticed, or always used to notice. Even the simplest of touches were far from innocent with him, except this time. Maybe he didn't want her anymore, and why would he? She’d treated him like crap for months, and she still had an extra twenty pounds of baby weight. Most of it was in her ass which had been big enough before she’d gotten pregnant. She held Irene tighter and hurried into the baby's bedroom, closing the door behind her.
She tried not to cry as Irene nursed. She deserved this. She’d pushed him away again and again. Yes, he’d done some things that he shouldn’t have, but she hadn’t been perfect either. She’d messed up from the beginning, lying to herself and to him. She knew in her heart that he never would’ve actually tried to take the baby from her. Even if he didn’t love her, he loved Irene, and he knew what it was like to grow up without a mother.
