Page 132 of Not Over You


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“If I was there with you, I would have, babe,” I declare.

Our date is in a few hours but part of me wants to just tell her it is me she is going to meet. But I don’t. I want her to realize that no matter what, we are a good match. We found each other without even trying this time. Even when we start talking as strangers, the two of us fit. We just make sense together like we did a lifetime ago, and like we will for the rest of our lives.

“Will you be out at the house this weekend?” she asks as I walk her to her car, neither of us in a hurry to end the day.

“Would you mind if I came out? I know you being here is hard enough on you, Pais,” I whisper, tucking her dark hair back from her face, letting my fingers brush over her smooth skin.

“No. I won’t mind. It was nice being there with all of us.”

“It was. It was nice being the two of us today, too, was it not?” I push gently, lowering my head to brush my nose over hers.

“Yes,” she breathes, her eyes fluttering closed.

My fingers grip tightly at her hips, dragging her closer. We share the same air for a moment as her fingers clutch at my chest, my heart thudding beneath her fingertips. Could I just kiss her like I want to? Tell her that she has been talking to me every single day since she came home and that she agreed to go out with me tonight? Ask her to give me another chance? Can I convince her that I want her for good and that I won’t screw us up again?

Just as I form the words to ask her, she pulls back.

Those blue eyes blink up at me and it is as if she just realized who she is standing here with. Who she is letting hold her. And who she laughed and spent the day with. As if a curtain has come down, her eyes close off to me and I sigh, letting her retreat for now. I can’t ask her to sacrifice anything more for me just yet. She already gave me everything and I threw it all away.

“See you later Bran,” she whispers, swallowing hard and turning to climb into her car.

“Yeah, babe,” I clear my throat as I wave her off, “see you later. In about an hour for our date,” the latter is said just for me before I head home to get ready to sweep my girl off her feet again.

Providing she lets me sweep her off her feet, of course.

CHAPTER 7

Paisley

* * *

Am I making the same mistake a second time?

Spinning in the mirror, I smooth my hands down over my dress and blow out a sigh. I should not be going on a date tonight. Not with someone I barely know. Even if I feel as I know him already and have shared things I rarely share with anyone.

Spending the day with Bran was like going back in time. No matter what we put one another through or what petty fight we got into, being together always came easy to us. We were friends first and that friendship may not be the same, but it is still there. And I would be lying if I didn’t admit to how good it felt when he put his hand on my back to guide me, or grabbed my fingers in his big, rough hand, or brushed a fond touch over my skin.

Going out with someone else feels wrong still, but I agreed to it. And a part of me wants to know what it might be like to go out with someone other than Bran. He was with someone else after me, or at least he led me to think he was, but I never tried again after we broke up. I threw myself into my work, focusing all my energy and attention on chasing my dream.

Maybe the dream I should have chased was just being with Bran.

“You look amazing,” Hailee’s voice calls from the doorway.

Catching her gaze in the mirror, I smile and thank her. The red dress with the sheer long sleeves, squared neckline, and silky second skin material does make me feel amazing. Usually, I am wearing overalls spattered with paint or markers, or oversized hoodies. Bran always liked me dressed down. He told me he thought it was adorable. Why the hell do I care what Bran likes right now? I am going on a date with someone else, not the man who broke my heart.

“Thank you, sugar,” I call back to her, smiling brighter, “I am nervous as hell. This will be my first date since Bran,” I admit as she comes into the room to fuss with my dress.

“What made you decide this guy?” she asks, pulling my honey brown hair over my shoulder and toying with it.

“I feel as if I can tell him anything. Maybe it is because I can, I guess,” I sigh, blowing my short bangs that are side swept over one brow out of my eyes, “am I crazy to be talking to some stranger and going to meet him?” I ask her, catching her gaze in the mirror again.

“No, sweetie, you are not. Nothing crazy about finding a connection with someone and exploring it. People do this all the time. It is no different than going to a bar and meeting someone if you ask me. This is better because you have been talking to him for weeks now. Some people get married after meeting for a few days. Why don’t we talk about what you really want to talk about, huh?”

Blinking at her in the mirror, I cock my head. Pretending not to understand what she means. But of course, I know what she means. What is making me doubt going out tonight and what held me back before is one simple thing. Bran North. What I felt for him has been buried deep for a long time—but it is still a part of me.

“I saw him today,” I whisper, bowing my head as the smile I can’t fight lights up my face, “we spent the day together. He showed me all over town because so much has changed. We did not change though. I miss him so badly, Hails,” I admit, tears blurring my vision until everything becomes a watercolor mess.

“Absolutely you miss him. He was your best friend before I was,” she grins at me, hugging me from behind as her soft voice soothes me, “he adored you and you adored him. That does not just go away even if you wish it would. When you love someone that way, sometimes when you least expect it you get a reminder that it’s not really gone from you. Connor and I know that better than most,” she says on a sigh, her eyes flashing as she recalls the rough patch they had before she first got sick, “but sometimes the ones we love are not right for us at that time. Maybe he is right for you now, in this moment in life. Maybe those moments already passed for you two.”

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