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I always loved Mack, and he always loved me. Yet I was the one who turned away from years of happiness with him because of what? Fear?
Inside I'm spiraling emotionally. On the outside I keep a smile pasted on my lips while struggling to come up with an excuse to run away from Mack.
He misreads my silence as cold-heartedness. "Let me guess, the list is too long to remember."
I turn from him and quickly dab my growing flow of tears. Bursting out into tears without being able to explain myself is the last thing that I need.
His voice goes soft, which makes me want to cry even more. “What's the matter, Brooke?"
I shake my head, staying quiet.
Mack is at my side in two steps and takes my hands in his. "Damn it, Brooke, don't shut me out again. Talk to me, tell me what's going on because I'd really like to know."
I let out a half-laugh, half-sob. "I'm so sorry."
His dark green orbs narrow, and he shakes his head. "For what?"
I shrug. "I don't know. Everything, I guess."
Mack releases my hands and runs his fingers through his hair, tugging on the ends of his dark blond locks, aggravated.
"Brooke, you’re going to have to be a little more specific than everything. You know what? I’ve had enough. Ever since I saw you a little over a week ago, my whole damn world has been turned upside down. Not just my life, but Ryker's and Tyson's too. So I have a few questions, and I'd appreciate it if you answered them honestly so we can stop tiptoeing around the elephant in the fucking fire station."
I laugh despite myself. "Fine. Sure, ask away.”
Mack aims directly at the heart of the matter. "Why did you give up on us?"
The question is a punch in the gut, but one I probably deserve. And he deserves the truth. Finally. "Once I graduated college, the reality was I had no idea how to make it in the world. I'm ashamed to admit that suddenly being engaged to a landscaper without any vision for his future seemed like a shaky plan at best."
Mack shakes his head. "You said get off your ass and make a plan, and I did. I had a plan for us!"
I scoff. "You made a plan for you."
Mack starts to deny it, shaking his head, but I press on. We should've had this conversation a decade ago. We could've put to rest a lot of unnecessary pain.
"You signed up for the military without even talking to me first. I wanted to make a life together, not blindly follow you and your flippant choices. It made me question if asking me to get married was another one of them."
Mack's head snaps up, and his eyes are ablaze with frustration. "Stop right there, Brooke. You're entitled to your opinions, and then there's my truth."
He moves directly in front of me, his breath slightly shaky, and takes a hold of both my hands. When he speaks, it's from his heart.
"I've only ever loved one girl. You. It's no secret, and I don't want it to be."
Although a full-grown man stands in front of me, it feels like the years have melted away and that Drake, the boy I met and fell in love with, is speaking.
"I've held you in a precious, untouchable spot in my heart since the day I first saw you. At one point, you were the only thing that kept my heart intact when everything else dark, violent, and ugly tried to rip it away.”
He runs his hand lightly down over my hair and rubs a lock between his fingers as he finds the words he’s looking for. “When our eyes connected for the first time, it felt like a part of my soul flew out of me and went right into you. You’ve had my heart, my love since day one, Brooke. You still do, and there's nothing flippant about that."
How many times is fate going to give me another chance with the love of my life? He is standing in front of me, asking what he can do to claim my heart, and I'm being a hard ass about it. I'm done denying myself what I know I want, what I've always wanted. Him.
This is it. A chance to start over and release all the memories that I have clung to as barriers to love and open my heart again. It’s so much easier to stay closed off and list excuses for why I shouldn’t even try to form meaningful relationships. But sidestepping experiences because of the fear of getting hurt is not living, it’s existing. I’ve been existing for far too damn long, and I owe it to myself and to Mack see what could be in store for us.
This is my second chance and I say yes to love. I say yes to Mack.
Reaching out, I cup Mack's handsome face, tilt on my toes, and press my lips to his. He circles my waist with one powerful arm and pulls me close, cradling the back of my head with his other hand. We stand holding one another, our lips pressed in a kiss, for seconds, minutes, hours. I don't know how long because time ceases to exist.
Everything around us falls away until it's just the two of us. All of the words that needed to be spoken finally were shared. The confusion, pain, and doubt is gone.
