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“You’d better fucking not, you little slut,” he warns, holding me down on the desk and grabbing my hair by the roots.
He starts to pound my pussy harder, and I let go. I can’t deny myself any longer. He’s pushed me to come this close to climaxing, and now I’m physically unable to turn back.
Maybe he knew it would be like this.
Maybe he knows I have no discipline.
“Oh my god,” is all I can say before I’m drenching his cock, dripping down my legs and even onto the carpet.
He doesn’t stop or even slow down while I cum. He gets faster and harder still, grabbing onto my hips so that I don’t slide away.
I feel so high that I couldn’t care less about how Akim chooses to discipline me for being so goddamn easy. All I can do is watch the colors flash underneath my eyelids, experiencing intense waves of radiating pleasure.
Akim groans deeply as he pumps his load, pressing me down into the desk as he goes so deep that I feel his balls against my pussy.
I lie across the rich wood surface of the desk, feeling my whole body shake as I attempt with no luck to regain control of myself.
It would seem that now, Akim has gained some of that control.
“Looks like we have some work to do with you,” he says, cleaning himself up before he walks out of the office as if nothing ever happened.
12
Akim
Delilah is always working so hard at the bar that I barely have time to speak with her, but watching her from across the room is good enough for me. She has this effervescence about her that captivates me. The way she moves and talks radiates such positive, warm energy that I haven’t seen in the girls I’ve dated around here.
It isn’t even that she’s the prettiest girl I’ve been with, at least not by conventional standards. But there’s a classic beauty about her, something timeless that reminds me of Audrey Tautou. Simplistic and sweet without a shred of bitterness.
When I think about all of these qualities that she has, I feel guilty about the possibility of having to involve her in the darker side of my business dealings. She’s already been through enough with her birth parents dying and her adoptive parents casting her to the side for her sister. How can I introduce the violence and bloodshed that comes with a lifestyle like mine?
I’ve realized that much of what I’ve been missing in my life with women is connection,chemistry. It’s something I thought was exaggerated or even lied about by everybody I know who has experienced it, but the time I’ve spent with Delilah has completely changed my understanding of it.
She makes me feel the way I felt as a child when the snow would melt and the sun would linger for the first time since before winter. That sense of newness, that kind of untainted curiosity. That’s what I feel when I look at her, and since the first time we had sex, all I’ve wanted is to have her over and over.
I’ve spent way too much of my life chasing women who just want me to spoil them. Throughout my whole adult life, I feel like I’ve never met a woman who I felt like I could trust completely. At first, I did, of course, until I had been betrayed time and time again.
It became a pattern. I would meet a woman through the business, either the daughter of an allied mafia boss or somebody who reallywanted to be,and she would draw me in with her looks and her shallow personality.
Usually, after a few months, I could figure out which TV character she had copied her identity from, and as soon as I figured it out, I lost interest in them completely. Sometimes I liked the person they were, and that was the hardest to swallow when I realized it.
There was one girl I dated when I was in my early twenties who absolutely transfixed me from the beginning. Her name was Anastasia, and I met her just before I left for the US. She actually ended up being one of the driving forces behind my decision to leave Russia.
She was a spoiled, petulant girl, even after she left college, and started to really see a future with me. She was beautiful, but she had used her beauty to lie her way through life, finally feeling some semblance of responsibility hit her shoulders when her father refused to support her anymore.
When she met me, she knew I would be able to keep her out of the workforce and within the confines of an extremely comfortable life with no work on her part. Her father had been mafia as well, and she had lived a mostly normal childhood up until he was caught by an undercover cop and sent to prison.
When he’d been taken in, he signed over all of his wealth to his third wife, leaving none for Ana. When she met me, she saw all of her problems fading into the background.
She knew exactly how to make me fall for her, and when she’d heard that my mother had died of cirrhosis, she used my grief to get closer to me until I would have gone to the ends of the earth for her.
And I did.
She had sent me after a former boyfriend of hers that she wanted killed, and she had made up a story about how he threatened to kill her if she went to the police to report him. I found him and killed him without a second thought.
I knew I was calculating and apathetic towards most people, but I would never have planned to kill my first man at twenty-two. If she had asked me to kill a thousand men for her, I would have done it without question because I was young and stupid.
And that’s what scares me.
