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I’m scared, too.
My chest hurts, and I can’t breathe, but I don’t look at the TV, I look at my pretty momma. She’s got long dark hair, with green eyes that look like glass when the light shines on it, shimmering.
“I need you to trust me, Ruki,” she tells me earnestly.
I know something’s wrong. Momma has never been so serious before, not when we’re alone. Yes, when Daddy is in the house, I know my momma stays quiet in the bedroom, but when we’re here without him, she’ll laugh and make jokes.
This time, though, there aren’t any laughs.
“But Momma, I’m scared.”
“I know, my sweet girl.” She smiles again and strokes my hair. I have hair like my daddy’s family: white blonde. It’s so light, sometimes I wonder how my momma had me. Her skin is darker than Daddy’s, and I’m a little bit in between that. I don’t look much like my father, but the blonde hair has always made me stand out from the crowd.
“Momma, where are you going?”
She glances over her shoulder, taking in the suitcase that sits there, waiting. Will she finally run away? Will she leave me here alone?
“We’re going on holiday,” she tells me then, looking back at me as she pulls me into her arms. I’m small for my age. Most of the teachers think I’m younger than I really am. And they all think I’m just a child. I may be young, but I know things happen in adults’ lives that they don’t want us to know.
I know my father isn’t a good man.
I know my mother should leave and take me with her.
But the moment she rises and tugs me from the sofa, the door flings open, slamming itself against the wall. My father saunters inside, and his glare is nothing short of evil like the bad men in cartoons.
“What’s going on here?” He glances between me and momma, and I wonder if he’s going to hurt us both. Or will he finally see he’s bad? “Care to tell me?”
“Fergus,” Momma pleads as she releases my hand, shoving me behind her as she straightens her spine. But it’s no use, because she can’t fight him. He’s taller, bigger, and stronger. “Please, let us just go to my mother’s house.”
“You’re not taking my fucking daughter anywhere.” There’s rage in my dad’s voice. Something violent that slaps my face with merely his words, and I can’t help but settle my butt on the cushions. It’s easier if I just sit quietly. He won’t notice me, and he’ll only talk to momma.
“Listen to me. Your focus is on the Sov—”
“Speak one more fucking word and I’ll end you.” I know he’s not lying. His hands are fisted beside him, and I wonder if tonight he’ll make momma’s face blue and purple again.
“I’m sorry, Fergus, please, just let me go,” Momma asks, and I almost want to cry out and beg her not to leave me, but the loud echo of dad’s hand against momma’s face is his response. She’s not going anywhere. Ever.
Dad walks into the bedroom wearing a dark suit breaking me from the memory that’s caused tears to sting my eyes. He looks at me for a moment before throwing his phone on the bed.
“Time to get going. Shower, change, and let’s go. I want to be out of here in the next ten minutes.” His voice doesn’t give anything away. I’m unsure of how he’s feeling or what he’s thinking, and that scares me more than anything. When he’s like this—silent, almost deadly—I fear, not only for my life, but for those I care about.
“Where are we going?”
“No questions, just obey.” He pulls out a cigar and settles in the chair, waving me along to get going. I’m unsure of what’s about to happen, but I have a feeling that I’m about to meet the men my father has been working for all this time.
Abner Lancaster may be behind bars, but he’s not alone in all this. And my father is clearly one of his most trusted soldiers. The only question is, once a soldier has performed his duty—what’s left for him after?
Silently, I make my way to the bathroom, and inside, I find my outfit. The leotard that hugs every inch of my torso. A deep blue silk skirt that I know will only just barely cover my ass, and the shoes that I once loved wearing. Now those ballet shoes are my downfall because, against my will, I’m meant to be the entertainment.
If you want to save me, Etienne, now is the time to do it.
11
Rukaiya
Dad is sitting beside me in the car that was rented for us by the men who he’s been working for. I don’t know who they are just yet, but soon enough, I’ll be surrounded by them.
