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It always seemed to calm down the shaking when I would touch her. I want nothing more than to be able to go to her now, but she won’t let anyone near her. Andrei, who is usually one of her favorites, tried and the glare she gave him was enough to stop him in his tracks.
We would be landing soon. We had packed clothes for her and wanted her to be able to change before we started the next leg of our journey. We all consulted with each other, trying to decide who should take her clothes to her. We decided that she was less mad at Misha, so he got volunteered. I’ve never seen that kid so scared in his life.
He walked slowly to her, talking to her so she wouldn’t be surprised. She had her head down again. We could all hear her quietly crying, as she hugged her knees to her chest, rocking back and forth.
“Gazelle. Sephie. We brought you some clothes to change into. We should also get you cleaned up. Your road rash needs attention. Adrik can help you. We don’t want anything to get infected. Please, Sephie. We want to help.”
She looked up at him. Her face was red, her eyes puffy from the constant crying. She reached for the clothes without a word.
“You can change in the back. There’s a door that closes so you have privacy. I can get you the first aid kit too.”
She nodded her head but put her head back down. She laid the clothes beside her on the seat. Misha came back with the first aid kit for her. She reached for it too, without saying a word. She barely looked at him.
But at least she didn’t punch him. I guess that counts for progress.
The look on Misha’s face as he went to sit back down was one of utter despair. He looked like he was barely able to keep it together. We were all barely keeping it together right now.
She quietly got up and went to the back, shutting the door behind her. We could hear her sniffle now and then. It sounded like she had opened the first aid kit. Then we heard her cursing. She was putting antiseptic on her wounds. By herself. Because of me.
I leaned forward, putting my head in my hands. Tears fell from my eyes. I felt so helpless. We should’ve told her the plan. I wish I would’ve told her. She could’ve handled it.
Fuck! Why didn’t I tell her before I went on stage?
I wanted to punch something. I heard her curse louder and cry out. She was quiet and then she called for Misha. He walked back to the door. “I need help,” was all she said. He walked in, closing the door behind him. I tried not to be jealous. I tried to be grateful that she was at least letting one of us help her, but this was killing me.
I heard Misha quietly say, “That one’s deep, Sephie. That doesn’t look good.” Then silence. Then, “It’s okay. It’s okay. We’ll get it fixed. We’ll get it bandaged right now and we’ll get it looked at once we land. It’ll be okay. Please don’t cry.”
He came out from the back a few moments later. The look on his face worse than before if that was even possible. He quietly said to me, “She’s got a wound almost down to the bone on her hip. I packed it as best as I could, but it should definitely be looked at by someone other than me. Soon.”
As soon as we landed, I would call ahead to Armando’s family and ask them to have a doctor waiting for us when we got there. The flight from Switzerland to his family’s ranch was a short one.
I heard the door open and she walked out in fresh clothes. She was visibly limping now. Her adrenaline rush was beginning to wear off. I’m sure she was in excruciating pain right now. She walked back to her seat in the back, not looking at anyone. She tried to pull her knees to her chest again but flinched in pain. Definitely in excruciating pain.
Goddammit.
We landed soon after and transferred to the helicopter quickly. She allowed Misha to help her on the helicopter. Progress. She still said nothing to anyone. It was a quick flight to Armando’s family’s ranch, just inside Italy. They took us to the house right away. The doctor was waiting for Sephie. He didn’t speak much English and we didn’t speak any Italian, but he could see she was hurt. The lady in charge of the house, Isabella, could speak some English. Enough to get by. She went in with the doctor to help translate.
I paced in the courtyard of the house, waiting for the doctor to be done with her. He came out with Isabella. He would speak, she would translate.
“He says most cuts not bad, heal soon. But cut on her hip bad. Can’t stitch up. Might need, uh, more skin?” she pressed her hands together and placed them over her hip.
Skin graft. She might need a skin graft.
“He gave her antibiotics. Must take all of them. No infection or it get into her bone. That’s very bad. Also gave her light sedative to help her sleep. She say her head hurt. He gave her pain pills too.”
Good. And bad. We couldn’t afford to have her sleep for three days again.
Ivan spoke up, “What pain pills? Name?”
Isabella asked the doctor to clarify, “Tramadol. Light pain pill. Shouldn’t make her sleepy or make …” she pointed to her stomach and drew circles around her stomach.
It shouldn’t upset her stomach. Good. Hopefully she wouldn’t go for a week without eating again.
Ivan looked at me, “That’s different from the one they gave her at home. Hopefully this one won’t knock her out. We’ll adjust the plan if it does. We’ll just have to make new arrangements for travel.”
We hadn’t noticed Sephie come out of the room. “By all means, don’t adjust anything on my account. I’m not taking them. I’m not risking sleeping for three days again.” She had one hand pressing on her hip, the other on her head. I couldn’t help it. I went to her without thinking. She flinched when I touched her, but she didn’t slap me this time. My hands went to her hair, trying to give her some kind of relief from her headache. She sighed. She was exhausted. I think that’s the only reason she allowed me to touch her. She didn’t have the strength to fight me right now. At this point, I was so desperate to touch her that I would take any in I could get.
I gently took her hand from her hip. I pressed on the spot that Ivan had showed me. She closed her eyes tightly. Ivan walked to her other side, taking her other hand from her head. She didn’t resist. She also wouldn’t open her eyes. He pressed on the spot on her other hand, trying to give her the most relief we could. We both saw the tears falling down her cheeks as she stood there.
