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I hated that I felt elation at hearing that. “And you just said he disappeared all the time.” Elation gone. What the hell was wrong with me?
“Listen, I don’t know what he was doing, but I don’t think he was off having sex with random chicks.” Emily sighed. “You look like you haven’t slept and you’ve lost weight. It’s Ream, isn’t it? I should’ve gotten to the bottom of the crap between you two before I left. I thought it would be over since you’re seeing Lance, but it’s not … for either of you. What’s going on? What happened, Kat?”
“Mouse?” Logan’s deep voice sounded outside the door. He didn’t knock before he opened it and went straight to Emily, helped her off the floor, and wrapped his arms around her. He looked at me and I shifted uncomfortably under his intensity. “I’m saying this because it needs to be said and Emily won’t … keep the shit between you and Ream under wraps.”
“You said that already. Yeah, I got it. We’re good.”
He grunted. “From the way you both looked at one another … nothing’s good.” Jesus why was everyone saying that? We barely even made eye contact. “Sort the shit out. I told him the same thing.”
“What did he say?”
Emily lowered her head and avoided my eyes. Damn, something was up and she wasn’t going to tell me. Although, I suspected she would if Logan hadn’t threatened her somehow, probably sexually. Normally, I’d find that hilarious because from what she’d told me, Logan’s dominant nature intensified in the bedroom.
Logan shrugged. Shit, he never shrugs.
I knew he was right though. Ream and I had to move past this. I needed to unearth the weed then destroy it. Only then could I move on and stop fighting him. No one ever said that pulling weeds was easy.
When I went back downstairs I was relieved that Ream wasn’t there and after chatting for a while with Crisis, Georgie, and Kite, I went out to the barn to check on my horse Clifford and the abused horses that arrived a few days ago. The one thoroughbred was restless in the stall and fearful of his own shadow. We had yet to let him out with the herd as we were scared he’d bolt right through the fence, so Hank and I had been hand walking him and were hoping Emily could help the youngster.
The motion light near the barn flicked on and I stopped.
Ream was leaning up against the door, arms crossed and looking none too happy. I was going to walk straight past him when he grabbed my forearm and brought me to a halt.
“What?” Goose bumps sprinkled across my flesh, and I felt heat flood my cheeks.
“You’ve lost weight. What’s going on with you?”
I yanked back, trying to dislodge his hand but he refused to give.
“Babe.” His tone was curt and unrelenting.
“Yeah, I heard you,” I shot back. “And don’t call me that.”
He stared at me and I was the one who had to look away first, and I didn’t like it. Why did he make me feel so uncertain of myself? I hated that he knew about my problem. It made me feel delicate, and I hated feeling delicate.
His hand slid down my arm and my stomach dropped. He linked our fingers together. “Then answer me.”
“I’m fine.” My pulse picked up speed as his finger caressed back and forth on my wrist. I don’t think he realized he was doing it.
“Not good enough, Kitkat.”
His nickname for me falling from his lips sent quivers down my spine. “Listen, Ream. We’ve fought. We’ve agreed that we hate one another. So, let’s just make it less awkward for everyone living here and just agree to ignore one another.”
“I never agreed to hate you, far from it. And I’m not living in the same house as you and ignoring you. It’s impossible. And I think you know that.” He stepped closer and his other hand came up between us and cupped my chin. “God, I fuckin’ need to kiss you.”
“What?” I moved back a step and the gravel beneath my feet sounded like gunshots going off I was so hyperaware. Where the hell had this come from? We fought; we didn’t talk about kissing. “You’ve got to be kidding.” I made an awkward sound like a laugh-snort and cocked my hip as I stared at him with disbelief. Was he delusional? On drugs? Ha, like that would ever happen.
“Are you drunk?”
“Never been more sober.”
“Kissing me is so far out of the realm of possibilities. Do orange juice and milk go together, Ream? No. They can sit beside one another and look good, but mix them up and it’s complete anarchy. That’s us.”
“Orange Creamsicles.”
“What?”
“It’s milk and orange and they go damn good together.”
I snorted and started to turn away when he yanked my arm and pulled me back around. I put my hands out to stop from banging into his chest, but as soon as my palms felt the muscles beneath his shirt, a liquid heat hit me between my thighs.
“I’ve never been the same.”
My breath hitched. “What?”
“After we were together. Something changed in me and I’m not going back. I like the change. And I miss the woman who gave it to me. I’m not talking just about the sex, Kat. It was before that.”
God, why the hell did he have to go and say shit like that? I was good. I could handle him pushing and me pushing back, but this … it was unsettling, and I didn’t do well with unsettling.
“I want us back. And I’ll take you any way I can have you. Even if it’s just friends, Kat. I’ll take it—for now of course. But the constant anger and pain we’re causing one another is destroying our beginning, and our beginning was something fuckin’ special.”
It was. Ream and I supported one another when Logan and Emily were down in Mexico. We became friends, and now that was wrecked too.
“What happened with Lana?” I blurted out. It may have been eight months ago, but him bringing Lana to my coming home party still hurt. “Did you fuck her?”
