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Oh, shit. I swallowed. “Sure. What’s up?”
He tapped a finger on the marble countertop, then his shoulders slumped. A very sullen look crept across his face. “Why did you pick J.D. for the mating chamber?”
There it was. Exactly the thing I knew he’d ask. He was obviously a little pissed about it. I wiped my hands on a napkin, but before I could say anything, Gavin went on.
“It’s just that I thought our date went really well. Weconnected, or at least it seemed that way to me. Ever since I got here, I’ve been trying to show you that I’m here for you, to take care of you and show you that we’re meant to be together.”
Now he wasn’t the only one who was a little pissed off. “Gavin, I’m not sure if you’ve noticed yet, but the chamber is completely my choice. I can do what I want with my own body. Or are you saying you somehowdeserveto go in there with me? Is that what this is? You think that because you feel a certain way about me, you get to control what I do?”
His face gave away his reaction—he realized he’d overstepped. The pissy expression vanished and he raised his hands in surrender. “Wait, no. That isn’t what I meant, it’s just—”
“Stop,” I said. I didn’t want to stop now that I’d started. “If I want to take someone in there and fuck their brains out, that’s my prerogative. It’s my body, my pleasure, my life. That’s not even the biggest part. I actually dolikeyou, Gavin. Way more than I thought I would when you first got here.”
His eyes brightened and a faint smile flickered across his lips. “You do?”
“Shut up and let me finish. Yes, I do like you, though I have to say, it makes me uneasy that you want to overthrow your pack and have mine absorb the remainder.”
Gavin’s brow furrowed. He couldn’t have looked more confused. “Wait, aren’t you on board with that? Surely you hate my pack even more than I do.”
I shoved my plate away. My appetite had suddenly disappeared. “It doesn’t matter what I think about your pack. What rubs me the wrong way is that you show zero emotional connection or affection for the group of people you were raised with.”
Gavin leaned forward, lacing his fingers together like he was praying in Heline’s temple. “But they’re terrible, Kira. You saw how my dad and Jayson treated you. They’re all like that. I can’t stand what they are. They need a change in leadership.Something.”
“Listen, I’m not an idiot. I’m a realist. All packs have problems, some more so than others. I get that. Even my pack can be frustrating to deal with at times, but the pack is family. Shifters, especially wolf shifters, are meant to protect and love their packs no matter what. It’s been that way since before recorded history, and the idea of you using me to turn all that on its head makes me feel… dirty, I guess.”
He shook his head vehemently. “I don’t want touseyou. I’m sorry if that’s how it came across when I explained it. Igenuinelywant you for my mate. To be with me forever, whether anything happens with my pack or not. I don’t want you to think I hate all packs. It’s super honorable that you’re so fiercely loyal to your pack. I get it. I’m not trying to disparage your pack when I say this, but…” He leaned in close, locking his eyes on mine. “Can’t you see how everyone’s blind devotion to packs can be dangerous? Giving everything you have to protect them up while they do awful shit?”
His words reminded me of Wyatt’s history. His pack had turned their backs on him, refused to acknowledge that his fated mate had been terrible and would have ruined his life. They hadn’t even fought for him. I frowned as I thought about my own situation. The pack elders had pushed my father to kick me out and force me to become a lone wolf because I’d been rejected at the altar. Wyatt had been so disgusted by it all that he’d voluntarily left his pack, leaving all the wealth and prestige behind. Gavin despised how his father and Jayson had handled things.
Was I the one who had it wrong? Did Wyatt and Gavin have the right of it while I simply followed along like an obedient little pack girl? The thought unsettled me.
“Can we not discuss pack politics right now?” I said, desperate to change the subject. “I can worry about that stuff later, after I’ve survived this damn show. Speaking of, I need to check on Chelsey. I haven’t had the chance to see how she’s doing since she drank that stupid tea.”
“Sorry,” he mumbled.
As I stood to leave, his expression turned pensive. He wanted to continue the conversation, but my brain was fried. I needed to get away, and I really did want to check on Chelsey. Hopefully, her scare with the wolfsbane hadn’t put her off helping me. I walked away before anything else could be said, leaving Gavin to stew.
Chelsey was on the back patio overlooking the courtyard closest to the helipad. She wore sunglasses and stared out at the sea. As I approached, she lifted a mug to her lips and sipped, then grimaced and set it back down.
“That looks pleasant,” I said.
She glanced my way, then looked down at the mug’s contents and wrinkled her nose. “The witches gave me this tea—jewelweed, basil, ginger root, and something called yarrow. It’s freaking gross, but it does help. The healers said I needed to drink four cups of the stuff today to flush out the rest of the toxins that their spells and potions didn’t take care of.” She pushed the mug away from the side of the table. “What’s up? Looks like you want to talk.”
Taking the seat opposite her, I gazed out at the rocky shore and ocean beyond. The view was like something from a movie—beautiful and majestic. I could hardly believe we were on the most dangerous piece of land in the entire world.
While I scanned the horizon, I tried to figure out what to say to Chelsey. Telling her about Zoe, Crew, Haven, and the plan to get everyone out with fake eliminations was out. For one, I didn’t want to get her hopes up. Not until Zoe sent word again. Until Wyatt and I had a concrete plan in place, it would be best to keep things vague.
Pulling my eyes away from the sea, I looked at her. “Didn’t come to talk. Not really. I saw you out here and wanted to make sure you were doing okay.”
She gave the mug a sidelong look. “Other than having to drink that vile shit, I’m okay.”
“So your, uh, head’s still in the game?” I asked pointedly.
She caught my meaning and glanced around for any cameras before leaning in close. “Still on the same page, yeah. These assholes almost killed me earlier. I’m done. Do we have a plan? Like maybe a press release or something?”
A press release? As if that was possible. Even if it was, no one would care. Everything that had happened so far was all part of the show. The fans back home would probably eat it up if we tried to raise a stink over stuff that had happened every season for over thirty years.
Chelsey was a bit naïve when it came to overthrowing powerful organizations. Not that I could call myself an expert, either.
