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It was a good question. Was I prepared for that kind of responsibility? I mean, if Neil and I had worked out, I would have been Dark Claw’s beta female anyway. I let out a deep breath and smiled. “Yeah. Yeah, I think I am.”
Epilogue
Jeremy let out a weary breath as he settled into his seat. The stately desk wasn’t his taste, but it had been in the alpha’s office for generations, and he didn’t think replacing it was really an option at this point. Keeping it had an odd effect on the room, though. It made it feel so impersonal and intimidating, but that was how the position of alpha of Dark Claw felt to him, anyway. Even several years after stepping into his father’s role, most days, Jeremy had a hard time believing that he was really the leader of the pack.
He hadn’t always felt like an adequate leader, that’s for sure. Especially lately. Neil shouldn’t have been in a position of power in the first place. Jeremy could see that now, clear as day. He kicked himself thinking about how he had defended the beta to everyone, never once suspecting he wasn’t fit for leadership. Worse even, Jeremy had endangered a pack member by recommending Neil as a chosen mate. Thankfully, Ella seemed to forgive him for that blunder, at least.
He reached under the desk andpulled out a large bottle of scotch. It was almost empty, a testament to how much stress he had been under the past few weeks. Jeremy told himself he would cut back at some point, but now he relied upon the comfort it brought him. Alcohol helped to numb all the guilt and anxiety. With Neil gone, it was slowly turning into his best friend.
Jeremy frowned as he poured it into the lowball glass. Either the liquor bottles were getting smaller, or he was drinking more. In any case, he would need to stock up again soon. He downed the brown liquid straight, ignoring the burn and waiting for its calming effect to settle in. Impatient for relief, he poured a second glass and then a third.
Slowly, the bad feelings dissipated, and he was able to breathe again.
There was a quiet knock at the door. Jeremy groaned, knowing it would either be his assistant, Grace, or his new beta, Gabriel. Neither option was ideal, especially while he was slightly buzzed.
“Come in,” he grumbled, shoving the glass and bottle back under the desk.
Gabe poked his head inside, just as Jeremy predicted.
“Do you have a minute to review some of the pack financials? Neil’s numbers just aren’t making much sense.” Pack betas traditionally handled pack finances, but it wouldn’t surprise Jeremy one bit if Neil had shirked some of those responsibilities. It seemed like everywhere he looked, there was proof of his former beta cutting corners.
Gabe didn’t wait for an answer, letting himself in and having a seat on the other side of the desk. Jeremy sighed, running his hands through his hair.
“Listen, Gabe…I appreciate your thoroughness, but honestly, this isn’t a great time.”
“Oh,” he said, eyes lowering to the report. “Yeah, I can, uh, smell the liquor.”
Jeremy scowled. “It’s been a long day.”
“Sure. I guess this can wait until tomorrow,” Gabe said, setting the files down. “Okay, you’ve got my attention. What’s up?”
Jeremy’s eyebrows raised. “What do you mean?”
“I mean, what’s up with you? I’m your beta, and you’ve been distracted, drunk, or both since I got here. What’s causing you to go on a bender? Or is this just normal behavior for you?” Gabe held the alpha’s gaze, almost challenging him to deny the truth. It was the sort of thing a seasoned second-in-command would do. For a naturally non-confrontational omega, he was settling into the beta position a little too well.
“It’s nothing,” Jeremy huffed. “I’m just not sleeping well, and all that shit with Neil is… well, shit. That’s what it is.”
“You’re not sleeping well?” Gabe asked, frowning. “Do you have any other symptoms?”
“Symptoms? What are you a doctor now?” Jeremy glared at him, annoyed at being questioned. “Fine. Yeah, I’ve just been feeling… I don’t know, a little restless, I guess. It doesn’t matter. I’ll be alright.”
Gabe gave him a thoughtful look before collecting the files.
“You know, Jeremy, it sounds sort of how I was feeling before I met Ella for the first time. They say that sometimes males can sense when they’re about to meet their true mate for the first time. Who knows? Maybe we’ll have an alphafemale soon.”
“Get out of my office, Gabe.” The last thing he needed was a mate to make a bad situation even worse. His wolf could grumble all he wanted, but Jeremy wasn’t in any shape to take on a female. He was fine being on his own and was more than willing to set anyone straight who thought otherwise.
