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At the end of the hall, it opens into a kitchen with an island that might be bigger than my entire kitchen. The soft white marble is in perfect contrast to the deep blue cabinetry that reaches up to the ceiling. All of the serving dishes laid out on the surface are stark white. I will give her this, she is amazing at making all her shit match.
I can hear chatter in the next room over and we keep moving toward it, continuing my tour. It's never hard to find Delaney instantly - the floral yellow dress is like a magnet for my gaze. Delaney's head tips back as her face turns into a laugh, the sound like the perfect song, getting stuck inmy head to accompany the kiss we shared. If I'm not careful, soon my brain will be overrun by her. It wouldn't be the first time.
Bryn is here too, in some kind of jumpsuit that makes her look like Tom Cruise from Top Gun. She spots me first, her eyes finding mine before she turns back to Delaney, tilting her head to signal that I am here. The air becomes void of laughter and all eyes are on me.
Delaney watches me for a long moment, no doubt trying to figure out why the hell I would shave off my beard. I get it, I fucked up.
"Our appetizers are just about ready, I will be right back." Carina leaves us to mingle as she clacks her way back into the kitchen. And I am left with a group of people where I only know two of them - one who hates me because she thinks it's my fault her friend got hurt, and the other the one who has shattered my heart on two different occasions now.
Colton walking in here almost knocked me clear off my feet. It was one thing to be around him as this new man with his confident stature and burly look. But when he walks into Carina's living room with his face freshly shaven, I swear I am back in high school. His soft cheeks, the way they accentuate the curve of his smile so well. I drift into the memory of running my hand over his face for the first time when we were young. How it made my stomach flutter feeling his jaw underneath, his babyface not yet slimmed out. The way it felt when his stubble started to grow, how it scraped against my neck as he peppered kisses along it.
I cast my eyes away from Colt, taking a long pull from my cocktail in the hopes it will get my mind to focus on something other than him. Or be less in focus overall. The sound of ice against metal gets louder as Bryn makes a drink for the new arrival. Out of all the guests here tonight, Bryn is the last person that should be in charge of making drinks - she can't be trusted to manage a three second pour.
Carina insisted that she didn't need help in the kitchen, urging us all to continue mingling in the living room, drinks in hand, chatter in the airand laughter drifting between us. The tone has fallen now that Colton is here, the subject of our conversation no longer fitting the audience. Before he arrived, Bryn and I were telling stories of our glory days. Before high school, before we got tits, just all the mischief we could find as adolescents.
"Do you remember that time we hopped the fence to Bryant Park Pool and had a midnight swim? Ugh, that was so fun." And just like that, Bryn has brought the topic of conversation into awkward territory. Because I do remember that time, and I bet Colton does too since he was there with us. The only way we were able to get in there in the first place was because Colton gave us each a boost over the chainlink before climbing up and over it himself. I shoot daggers at Bryn with my eyes, hoping she can feel them stabbing into her chest for bringing this up.
"That was the first time I ever got arrested," Colton adds, and somehow I had forgotten that he took the fall for us trespassing that night.
"Arrested? As in, you were there too?" Carina asks as she comes back into the living room with a tray of finger foods. "I didn't realize you were such a delinquent growing up." She bumps into his shoulder, trying to pass it off as playful, even though I know she is judging us so hard right now.
"We all grew up together. Well ... Delaney, Bryn and I." This is the first time I have heard him acknowledge our past around other people and it blooms hope in my chest that he is coming to terms with everything that happened recently between us.
"We didn't really grow up together, we met Colton in high school." Where Colton and I continued to fall in love and then I shattered his heart into a bajillion pieces because I was a wreck.
"Well, I came bearing gifts! In the form of appetizers of course. These are miniature sausage and spinach pinwheels and the dip is just a ranch thing that I whipped up." She places the tray down on the coffee table in the center of conversation and some of the other guests practically jump on the plate.
Colton gets up, rubbing his hands along his dark jeans before leaving the room without a backwards glance. I follow him, unspoken words ready to spill out of me. When I get into the entryway, he is wandering up the stairs. As soon as my feet hit the bottom step, he turns and sees that I'm behind him, but that doesn't stop his movement. At the top of the stairs, he pauses, looking left and then right, as if trying to figure out where he should be going. I take his hand in mine and lead him over to Carina's bedroom. The air is silent between us until I click the door shut once we are both inside.
"Laney, I ..." I don't give him a chance to finish his sentence, my lips colliding with his and swallowing down whatever words were on his tongue next. He wastes no time curling his arms around me and I can feel the emotions coursing between us.
Anger.
Sympathy.
Love.
Longing.
Colton pulls back, ending the kiss. Our breathing is heavy between us, my hand on his neck, his hands still wrapped around me, our chests together.
"I'm so sorry Colt. I know you must be hurting and I hate that I caused you pain ... again. It was never my intention, I just - I knew that there would be no way for us to move forward if you didn't know everything." My words spill out like streaming water from a watering can, sprinkling on the seeds I hope will grow. I want to keep growing with Colton. After five years of harboring secrets and dreaming of him, I can practically reach out and touch my happy ending. Then again, he has his arms around me right now.
"And I'm sorry that you felt you couldn't bring this to me at the time." His hand moves up from my hips and grips my chin, pulling my downturned eyes to lock with his chocolate irises. "We can't keep things from each other anymore. Do you promise?"
All I can do is respond in a nod, the floodgates of my tears bursting open. "Does this mean ... Do you forgive me?"
He shakes his head and I think his answer is no until he speaks again. "There was never a question if I would forgive you, Delaney Thorne. I needed to process things, to catch up to you in the grief and understanding. Acceptance. I only wish that we could have worked through this back then, that we didn't miss five years, that we could have spent learning each other. I have missed you so fucking much and honestly, it's been a struggle. Until I saw you that night at Thornes In Bloom and it's like someone snapped their fingers and the trance was broken. I was me again. And there can't be me without you. I love you, I always have and I always will. You're stuck with me now, no givebacks, no ninety day return policy."
"I loveyou Colton Reeve. I'm throwing away the receipt." I say with a giggle, the tears are done flowing but the last few on my cheeks leave wet trails in their wake.
"Can we leave now?" He asks with an even more serious tone in his voice than he had as he claimed me as his a moment ago.
"I don't think that would be right of us. You can't survive a dinner with these random people?" I raise my eyebrows at him.
Colton lowers his lips to my ear, his hand still on my chin, turning it just enough that he can whisper even though no one is around to hear him. "I have been waiting five long, torturous years to get back inside you Delaney and I'm not sure I can handle a few more hours."
I'm instantly wet for him and the inner struggle of whether to stay or go is like a set of uneven scales, the choice obvious and winning hands down. I want to bring Colton home and ravage him.
