AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I nodded. Pressing his calves against Derringer’s side again, Trey asked the horse to trot. Behind me in the saddle, I felt his hips rise to post. I leaned into him and matched his rhythm. Since Trey and I were virtually sharing a saddle at the moment, it was a bit difficult for me to do anything but remain close within his arms. As the horse trotted, our bodies moved up and down in the saddle in unison. Although I had no idea what lovemaking felt like, I suspected the rhythm was similar to this.
At the far end of the meadow, there was a crystal clear stream and plenty of shade trees. He reined the horse over to a large tree that offered ample shade. A couple of yards away, there was a large log lying horizontally on the ground that bordered the stream. Trey slid down off of the horse, taking me with him. I was puzzled by the short ride, but my instincts told me that we were going to have a discussion first. Play later. He dropped Derringer’s reins to the ground. The horse happily stayed close, eating grass.
“Come with me, Tylar,” he held out his hand and I slipped mine into it. We walked over to the log, and Trey straddled it, pulling me down once again in front of him. This time I was facing him. I looked up at him questioningly.
He smiled and held out his hands, pulling me close to him, cupping my chin gently with his hand, and tipping my face up to meet his eyes. Those sapphire blue eyes were so intense and yet tender at the same time. He gazed at me beneath his dark lashes and I knew it was time. It was time for me to feel his full lips on mine and God I wanted to!
“I need you to know something Tylar,” his tone serious. “I'll never go beyond the boundaries of what you permit me to do as far as touching you. Do you understand what I’m saying?”
“I think so,” I whispered, studying his expression closely.
He continued, “I'll never let our relationship get physical beyond what you're ready for, regardless as to whether you communicate otherwise, okay?”
Oh God, he's referring to that whole, “Trey, will you fuckme?” disaster.
I felt myself turn beet red. I pulled my legs up, folding them in front of me like a fort of protection. I wrapped both arms around my bent legs and lowered my face so that my chin was resting on my knees, I avoided his eyes. I felt embarrassed and ashamed. I suspected he guessed that I was a virgin, and a damaged virgin at that. Trey reached out with his hand, tilting my chin up, forcing me to look into his eyes. Eyes that were searching mine for something.
“Tylar you've nothing to be ashamed of, do you understand that? We're going to make this right, damn it, I promise you that!”
Okay, now I'm a bitconfused.
Obviously, he'd figured out I was a virgin. I loved that he was telling me that I'd no reason to be ashamed of it, but what I totally wasn't getting was his promise to me that“we”were going to make it right. Trey sensed my confusion.
“Do you want to talk about it Tylar?” he asked softly.
“I do,” I answered, “but I'm a little bit embarrassed as well as confused.”
“Just tell me what confuses you. You’ve no need to be embarrassed about anything; it’s not your fault, do you understand?”
“Okay, here goes Trey. I'm going to just blurt it out because I can’t candy-coat stuff. That's just not my style”
He nodded, ready for it.
“I love that you're okay with the fact that I'm still a virgin and all,” I blurted. “But what I don’t understand is your promise that you and I are going to make that right when you refuse …uhhh…you are reluctant to fuck me because I guess you think I’m not ready. So I guess my question is how much longer do you think my virginity needs to stay intact?”
I looked at him and suddenly realized I'd totally blown his mind. He couldn’t say I hadn’t warned him about my bluntness. I continued to watch him closely, waiting for a response. His expression was that of shock or confusion. Maybe a little bit of both.
“You’re avirgin?” he finally sputtered. “I'd no idea; my God, are you sure?”
“What do you mean, am Isure?I think I'd know, don’t you?"
He looked stunned.
"What the hell did you mean when you said ‘I'd nothing to be ashamed of’ and 'we'd make it right,’ then if you weren’t referring to my virginity?”
“I was referring to what I presumed to be sexual abuse in your past. I mean the dreams, your aversion to things that come on suddenly. It points to some type of abuse; I guess I just assumed it was sexual.”
“What?” I yelled. “Are you serious? Don’t you think that I'd know it if I'd been sexually abused?”
“How do you explain the dream last night?”
“It was a nightmare Trey! I’ve had a few since my concussion. They're weird and a little scary, yes, I admit that, but to think they indicate I've been raped or abused? That’s absurd!”
“In last night’s dream you were screaming things at me. You were asking me why I was letting ‘her’ use me to hurt you. You then screamed that you could do those things; that you could be what she is.”
“So?” I asked, defensively. “None of that sounds like I was raped does it?”
“Who isshe, Tylar?” Trey demanded, “Issheyour mother?”
