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Asa snorted. “And probably using you as free childcare for his kid.” He paused as he lifted the coffee cup to his lips and added, “For both of his kids, if that’s how you want to look at it.”
Tears sprang to Esme’s eyes, and she bit down on the inside of her cheek to keep them from spilling over. She understood the concerns Asa and Freya were expressing. Those same niggling doubts kept her up at night, adding to her exhaustion as much as caring for two three-month-olds did. Seth had done a number on her ability to trust people and learning more about her paternal grandfather and great-uncle didn’t bolster her overall belief in men.
She loved Asa dearly, but he wasn’t exactly a poster child for commitment or how to maintain a mature relationship. Her brother was a ladies’ man, although he always seemed to remain friends with his exes—everyone loved Asa.
“There’s only one way to look at it,” she said, gathering her resolve. Doubts could swirl all they wanted when it came to her and Ryder, but she was sure about her commitment to their sons. “Do you consider Chase any less your nephew given what I’ve just told you?” she asked her brother.
“Hell, no.” Asa looked affronted by the suggestion. “I love that kid.”
“I know you do.” Esme murmured. “So, is there room in your heart for Noah as well?” She picked up her phone from the table. “He looks like you and me when we were babies, Asa.”
“I wouldn’t care if he had Bea’s carrot top or was a dead ringer for the man in the moon.” Asa took the phone from her, smiling as he scrolled through her camera roll. “He’s family, too. I’m going to teach both those boys to ride a horse and throw a ball and—”
“If Ryder Hayes will allow it,” Freya said softly. “Esme isn’t in this alone anymore.”
“She was never alone.” Asa shifted the phone so Freya could look at the photos with him.
“I felt alone,” Esme admitted. Although her brother looked shocked, it was apparent Freya already had an inkling as to the way Esme had been struggling despite doing her best to appear like she had it all together.
“I understand what Ryder and I are doing seems unorthodox, but it also means that I have someone to share the responsibility of parenthood with. And I needed that more than I let myself acknowledge.”
Asa leaned forward, his familiar dark brown eyes shimmering with brotherly affection. “You’re my little sister. I’m here for you...whatever you need, Es. I’d like to meet my new nephew and Ryder Hayes, too. This guy needs to know that you are something special and not just because you’re available to watch his children.”
She shook her head. “That’s not how he treats me, Asa. I promise. Ryder has an important job, but he’s taking a leave of absence from his company while we transition to this co-parenting thing. Neither of us has all the answers, but he values me. He makes me feel like I’m important to him, and that’s a big change from my late husband.”
“Rest his soul,” Freya murmured.
“Not to speak ill of the dead.” Asa rolled his eyes. “But your late husband was an undisputed jerk.”
Freya and Esme both chuckled at Asa’s plainspoken assessment.
“You have to say that because you’re my brother, but I appreciate it anyway. That’s the kind of I’ve-got-your-back loyalty I want Chase to have with Noah. We both know that growing up without a father was hard on Dad and Uncle Peter, but they were in it together, and that made a difference.” She sighed. “My sons are going to have both a mother and a father. They’ll never have any reason to doubt how much we love them. We might not be a typical family, but Ryder and I are dedicated to the boys and making this work.”
They all had a few moments to digest the conversation as the waitress came to clear the plates, blatantly flirting with Asa as she did. He had an easy way with women, although he didn’t seem interested in being tied down.
Bea’s initial comments about Ryder, his brother and dad still lurked in the corners of Esme’s mind and heart. It was simple enough to tell herself not to get overly attached to him. Theirs was an arrangement of convenience—just last night over dinner, he’d tentatively suggested they begin the search for a new house, one where they could raise the boys together but each have more privacy. He seemed to think there were options around Chatelaine for properties with multiple dwellings.
The suggestion was a reminder that the situation wasn’t merely temporary, but forever. She’d immediately wondered if her worries about him needing space for entertaining potential lady friends might be justified in spite of his denial about wanting to date.
So far, the two of them had been together every night, making dinner in her galley kitchen or ordering carryout. They took the boys on daily walks and had paid a visit to the local bookstore, Remi’s Reads, because it turned out that Ryder was as avid of a book nerd as Esme. He was handsome, sweet, successful and a reader. Was it any wonder she was drawn to him?
She could also imagine him attracting the attention of eligible women around town the same way her brother did, and she didn’t know how she would eventually deal with that and not let him see that it hurt her.
“Do you have an idea of how the switch occurred when no one at the hospital realized it?” Freya asked as she handed her credit card to the waitress. Their great-aunt always insisted on paying, which bothered Esme.
She knew Freya had loads of money, although the older woman chose to live at the Chatelaine Motel, an aged and somewhat shabby motor lodge at the end of town, because she claimed to enjoy the charm of it.
But Esme didn’t want her to feel like they only spent time with her because of her financial support and hoped eventually Freya would feel close enough with the Fortunes to open up about her life. Esme’s grandma still lived in Cave Creek and remained uninterested in visiting Chatelaine. Ryder was close with his mom, but she lived hours away in Houston. They didn’t see each other often based on what he’d shared, particularly given that his father’s serial cheating and his parents’ eventual divorce had been difficult on his mother. So, as far as Esme was concerned, Freya was the closest thing her boys would have to a grandma figure living nearby, and she wanted to find a way to forge a meaningful connection in a way that made her great-aunt comfortable.
“Ryder is determined to get to the bottom of who’s responsible for what happened that night,” Esme said. “Although, I’m not sure it matters. What’s done is done, and I don’t see the point of dwelling on the past.”
Freya’s mouth pressed into a thin line. “People need to be held accountable.”
“I suppose,” she agreed. “But the only lead we have so far is a nurse who remembers an older woman with a volunteer badge hanging around that night.”
“Well, no matter what you find out, there’s no doubt in my mind that you’ll be an excellent mother to Chase and Noah,” Asa said, pushing back from the table. He gave Esme a hug that turned into a gentle headlock, one of his signature older brother moves. “I remember when you were a pipsqueak and you played dolls for hours on end.”
“You were extremely rude about wrecking my teddy-bear tea parties,” Esme retorted as she elbowed him in the ribs.
