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A knock at the bedroom door startled me and stopped me from my hasty packing, and I contemplated ignoring it.
“Elix?”
Grounding my teeth, I knew I had no choice but to respond, Jace surely knowing I’d gone nowhere with the guards standing outside my door. Still, I thought about leaving him out there. I wasn’t ready to talk to him yet. I wanted to prepare mentally and physically for what needed to be said without getting overly emotional and saying the wrong thing.
He knocked again, this time louder and with more insistence. “Elix, open the door, please.”
He did say please, and I couldn’t avoid him forever, especially not if I needed his help.
Smothering a sigh, I exited the dressing room and strode toward the front door, opening it before turning back toward the bedroom.
“Elix?” He sounded confused to see my retreating back.
“I’m in the middle of something,” I mumbled. “We can talk in here.”
His footsteps followed me up the steps to the bedroom, and he recoiled to see my open suitcase on the bed, clothes half packed inside. “Woah! What are you doing?”
I didn’t stop, my mind partially on him, half on what I was doing. This time, I wanted to be sure that I had everything I needed. The memory of arriving in Copehaven with a fewchanges of clothing and not much else still left a bitter taste in my mouth.
“Elix, stop! What are you doing?” Jace urged, stepping toward me.
“What does it look like?” I sighed, without an iota of malice in my voice. “I’m packing.”
“Okay, yes, I can see that, but why? Where are you going?”
Smothering a sigh, I turned and confronted him, squaring my shoulders. I had to be an adult about this. I wanted him and Saint to treat me like a grownup, so I needed to start acting like one, too.
“I obviously can’t stay here, Jace.”
Dumbfounded, his full, perfect lips parted, and I suddenly just wanted to throw myself in his arms and cry. Instead, I spun back around and continued packing, no longer being selective about what I was throwing in the luggage.
“What? Would you just stop!” His strong arm took hold of my upper arm, and he spun me around, catching me off guard. “Talk to me! Why are you doing this? Now especially!”
Intense chocolate eyes clashed with mine, waiting for a fight, but there wasn’t one in me to give. I wasn’t mad. I was defeated now. This was the end of the road for me. I could see it now with blinding clarity.
Jace didn’t want me. He wouldn’t throw me out, of course. He couldn’t in good conscious put me on the street, but he didn’t want me there, either. Saint would keep me in a glass cage like he always had. Eventually, I would have to forgive my brother, but for now, the hurt inside me was far too deep. And Lysandra would keep hunting me until I gave into her demented desires… which I never would.
“Elix…”
My choices were limited.
I shrugged him off gently and stepped back, continuing my task of packing. “I need to go somewhere else, Jace,” I mumbled. “Far away from you, for starters.”
Through my peripheral vision, I caught his look of utter dismay. “What?!”
I raised my head and shook it. “I mean that Lysandra isn’t going to give up, and you don’t really want me here, anyway,” I explained quickly. “It doesn’t make sense that I sit here like a sitting target. We still don’t know if she has others backing her or what.”
Jace didn’t say anything for a long moment, his silence stabbing me in the heart, but I pursed my lips and maintained my decision.
“Where will you go?”
I exhaled. “I don’t know,” I admitted. “Maybe Ironhelm. I hope she won’t cross the border, but I honestly have no idea what’s going on in her mind. She has a connection to Silverhold, but I don’t think she has much of a connection with Ironhelm.”
I peeked at him hopefully, waiting for him to offer me protection as my heart cracked more. He was silent for so long, I wished I hadn’t said anything at all.
Jace’s jaw tightened, and he stepped closer to me as I pulled open the drawers to the armoire and began pulling out t-shirts. Some fell on the ground, but I didn’t bother to pick them up.
“Will you stop doing that for a minute and look at me?” he rasped. Sighing, I obliged, dropping the pile into my bag and meeting his eyes. “I wish you hadn’t taken off,” he grumbled.
