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"No kidding." Kellan arches a brow as he cuts a piece of fresh bread and holds it out for me. "He always been that way?"
"Probably worse. He used to work with my dad on the ranch and play hockey. It was a lot of grueling hours, so he was always hungry."
"What about you?"
"Was I always hungry?" I ask, scooping up a bite of soup. "Nope."
"I mean, what did you do, smartass? Did you enjoy life on the ranch?"
"It wasn't so bad."
"Then why move all the way out here?"
I shrug, avoiding giving him an answer.
He notices and lowers his spoon. "Ranch life wasn't for you?"
"It wasn't that," I say. "It wasn't the ranch that was the problem. It was the fact that everyone knows everyone." I take a spoonful of soup, savoring the rich flavors. It takes exactly like my mom's. "I felt like I was suffocating."
"Too many eyes on you," he murmurs, trying to understand.
"Too many eyes that idolize Jonas."
Kellan's brows furrow.
"He's the hometown hero," I explain. "All the women wanted to date him, and the men wanted to be him. I couldn't go anywhere without someone reminding me that I'm his little sister. They either wanted to get close to me to get close to him, or they wouldn't come near me because of him."
"Goldfish guy," he says, putting the pieces together.
"Goldfish guy. Grocery store guy. High school football guy. Basically, every guy that's ever crossed my path." I scrunch up my nose. "The funny thing is, I didn't even want to date any of them. But it would have been nice to have that option, you know? It wasn't even about them, really. It was about me and what I wanted." I grimace. "That probably makes me sound terrible, doesn't it?"
"No. You're allowed to want your own life without constantly being compared to your sibling or without his reputation creating a wall around you. Small towns can be difficult, especially when someone makes it big, but the rest of the family stays behind."
"Yeah." I sigh, relieved he gets it. "I'm really proud of him, but I don't want to spend the rest of my life being just Jonas's little sister. I want to be Parker, and I want that to be enough for once."
"So you moved in with your brother to avoid living in his shadow," Kellan smirks at me. "You sure that's the best idea?"
"Nope," I say, taking another spoonful of soup. "But no one knows me here. I'm not Jonas's little sister in Nashville. I'm just a random girl. I like it."
I don't mention the fact that moving in with Jonas was my only option. My parents were not going to agree to let me leave the country unless I came here. I may be grown, but I'll never bethatgrown to my parents.
We eat in silence for a few minutes before I work up the courage to ask him what I've been dying to know since he brought it up earlier. "Did I really um…" I try to think of a delicate way to put it but I can't think of one. "Well, the first time we met, were you really…?"
"Are you trying to ask if I was lying about you making my dick hard, Rebel?" he asks, leaning back in his chair with his handslaced together behind his head. His cocky smirk and the amused glint in his amber eyes is far too sexy.
"No. Yes." I huff. "Maybe."
"I wasn't lying." He meets my gaze, his unyielding and honest. "I haven't been able to get you out of my head since then. You think I was only at that club last night because Jonas asked me to help him get in?"
"I…" I lick my lips. "Yes."
"I was there for you." He rises to his feet, causing his chair to scrape across the cement. My heart thuds in time to his steps as he circles around the table to me. One step.Thud.Two steps.Thud.Three.Thud.Four. He wraps his hand around my chin, tilting my head back until my eyes meet his again. "Had Gordon touched you, I would have ripped his fucking head off."
"Oh," I whisper.
He holds his hand out to me, waiting until I extend mine to pull me up from my chair. He's so close, my nose brushes his chest. I feel the heat rolling off him. Lord, he's ungodly powerful. I'm not a small girl, but he dwarfs me, his frame swallowing my shadow like a black hole. Only it isn't destructive, cold, or terrifying. It's grounding, warm, and exhilarating. He centers me, makes me feel a little less chaotic.
Most of my life, I've been spinning like a top, unmoored and directionless. I don't feel that way now. For the first time, I feel like I'm right where I'm supposed to be, doing exactly what I'm supposed to be doing. There is no rush to escape, no wildness threatening to burst free. I'm just…still. Content. I don't think I've ever been to either of those things before now.
