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She stiffens, but her fingers continue their calming motion. Not that it helps.
“The fucking name, Alessa.” My voice breaks as red curtains my vision.
“Please, Dante, don’t—” I flip us over before she can finish her sentence. Crushing her into the mattress underneath me I search her eyes, hoping she can see the torment inside despite my entire body radiating with deadly intent. I don’t want to hurt her. I never fucking want to hurt her again. All I need are two simple words and the longer the silence continues, the more unhinged I’m becoming.
“Please,” I choke out in a voice I don’t recognise. Or maybe it was she who spoke the words, her eyes filling with fear once more as she studies my face.
“C-Casper…Lockwood,” Alessa finally croaks out, and just like that, I’m standing beside the bed, her body still splayed out in my bed as she reaches out to grasp my hand, stop me from what she must know I’m about to do. “Please, don’t leave,” she sheds a tear. I lean over her and kiss it, tasting the salt on my tongue.
“I will make this right, Alessa.” I will make this right if it’s the last thing I do on this fucking Earth.
23
ALESSA
The rain doesn’t fall. The thunder doesn’t strike. And the sky doesn’t turn red as I watch the bedroom door with my heart in my throat, feeling like the world is ending. It’s the confusion at what just happened that has me immobile. My head hurts from the mixture of emotions I’m feeling. I’m spent, yet on edge. Elated but afraid. Hurting and feeling safe at the same time.
Slowly, I lift myself into a sitting position, my eyes still trained on the door despite the fact I know there’s no chance of him coming back anytime soon. A part of me knows exactly where he went, even if I can’t quite believe it. I could see the intentions behind his eyes. And goddamn it, I should feel something. Anything. But I’m numb.
He gave me my power back. Made me cherish being in control and giving that control away. He made those awful memories disappear and replaced them with his fingers, with his lips and then… he just left. Shrouded in a cloud of what felt like guilt. Yet, he had nothing to be guilty of. He didn’t take anything I wasn’t willing to give freely.
My stomach rumbles, reminding me that it’s been hours since my last proper meal. Come to think of it, I don’t evenknow what time it is. It feels like weeks have passed since I woke up on the floor of our office with Dante standing above me. My mind is racing from the events of the past twenty-four hours. The goons in my apartment, the restless sleep. Dante’s vulnerability when he realised he nearly shot me. His insistence I stay in his house where I’d be the safest. The strange man in the library who kept calling me Rosa. The training session in the gym with Dante, followed by what we did on the mats and later in this very bedroom. And then his swift exit.
I’m emotionally and physically exhausted. And I’m hungry. Plus, all my stuff, including my phone, is still downstairs, somewhere in the kitchen. I should really check in with Mel, make sure she found somewhere to stay overnight, and that she was safe. My brain feels overloaded with the amount of stuff I should be doing, but at this moment in time, all I can think about is stuffing my face.
I should probably have a shower after the workout I’ve had, maybe even try to find a change of clothes, but I’m too tired. So, with my hair a mess, and still in Dante’s oversized and now wrinkled workout clothes, I pad barefoot down the stairs and make my way into the empty kitchen.
Except it’s not empty.
“Hello.” The beautiful woman behind the kitchen counter smiles at me. Instantly, my hand flies to my hair, trying to smooth the rat’s nest atop my head. There are pots and pans on the stove in front of her steaming away, yet she looks like she just walked off a catwalk.
“Ummm, hi?” I take a tentative step forward. Her black hair is pulled into a tight ponytail and her makeup is flawless. As are her nails, I notice when she moves to grab a huge knife and starts chopping a bunch of herbs, not taking her eyes off me. I swallow, feeling oddly out of place.
“IsSaintupstairs?” she asks, her eyes dragging up anddown my body, assessing me. My skin crawls uncomfortably, and I wish I had that shower I dismissed so nonchalantly earlier. I must look a right state.
I shake my head, not liking the way she almost moans his nickname. “He left a while ago,” I say, then go over to my bag, which is sitting in the corner of the room, exactly where I left it. After some rummaging, I find my phone, the black screen of death greeting me when I try to unlock it.Great.
Hoping there’s a charger around somewhere, I look around the room. When my gaze glances past the woman cooking, I stop. Her hands are crossed in front of her chest, annoyance painted on her face as she motions with her head to the end of the kitchen island, where I spot a built-in wireless charging dock blending into the marble counter.
“Thanks,” I mutter, walking over and placing my phone on the top. Biting my lip, I turn back to face her and lean against the counter, my senses intrigued by the smells coming from around her. Whatever she’s cooking smells incredible.
She narrows her eyes at me. “I can call a car service for you.”
“That’s nice,” I reply, pulling out a bar stool and placing my butt squarely in it. “But you don’t need to.”
“Look, I’m sure you’ve had a great time and all, but you should learn to take a hint. If a guy leaves, so should you.”
She’s really trying to get rid of me, isn’t she? “What are you doing here, then?”
“I’m his… chef.” She lifts her chin up. “I take care ofallof Saint’s needs.”
A zing of jealousy shoots through me. “Like scraps, don’t we?” I glance at my phone, which has started powering up. Finally! Don’t know how long I can pretend to be social. Especially to someone who wants me gone. No matter how delicious the food she’s cooking smells.
“Listen, cheap slut, I was here before he had you, and I’ll be here when he’s bored of you. He always comes back to me.Always.”
“Lorena!” A sharp voice startles us both. I turn to see a pissed off Angelo standing in the doorway. “Know your place,” he hisses at her before smiling at me and saying, “How did the training go?”
I grin back. “I got in a jab. Pretty sure it rearranged his kidneys, though. It was very powerful.”
