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Chapter 4 - Anita
I couldn’t believe how fast things were moving.
If I had known my financial woes would be solved within days of Phil harassing me, I would’ve never worried about texting him back. Shoot, no response was a response, wasn’t it? Men like him thrived on attention. By giving him a firm warning to leave me alone, I probably would have added fuel to the fire.
But honestly, nothing could come close to the thrill I felt walking up toStork’son such a bright winter day. Even the chilly weather couldn’t penetrate my warm excitement. It felt good to march up to the door and push that red intercom button.
The speaker crackled. “Welcome toStork’s. Do you have an appointment?”
“I’m here to be inseminated!”
I blushed as I stared at the speaker. That woman must have been laughing her head off given how long she took to get back to me. “Last name?”
“Coleman.”
Seconds later, the door popped open. I swung it wide, trying to avoid the heat of embarrassment growing in my cheeks. I had been waiting for this moment for two weeks, taking my IVF medication every morning as prescribed. Once I knew I was ovulating, I called Patricia. She booked me the same day.
I rested my hand over my chest when I saw the lobby ahead. Within a few more feet, I would be minutes closer to being pregnant for the first time in my life. I would be giving someone a child. I would probably never see that child again.
That was something Patricia had been sure to review with me. A lot of emotions would come along with this process. I made sure to jot down my thoughts every evening in a notebook next to my bed. Memphis helped—and by that, I meant that hetypically flicked his fluffy tail in my face while I was trying to write.
Another few steps put me in front of the sign-in sheet. After signing my name, I turned around with my breath caught in my throat.
Liam wasn’t here.
That was another thing Patricia had discussed with me. Sometimes, the parents wouldn’t be present for every appointment. Sometimes, they would change their minds. In this case, I figured Liam might have been busy with his repair job that he’d told me about while we were signing the contract.
Repairs explained why his muscles were so thick. A guy like that didn’t need to wear more than a windbreaker during winter, being corded like that. He could probably bench-press me both nowandduring my third trimester. Being the subject of that kind of fantasy would definitely get me in the mood for getting pregnant.
Maybe not entirely in the way that was about to happen, but the thought still counted, right?
I took a seat in one of the huge, cushioned chairs, clutching my tote bag to my chest. Everything about the procedure was simple. I would lie back with my feet propped up in stirrups and my pelvis elevated. As far as I was concerned, it would just be a glorified pap smear.
My cheek twitched as anxiety settled into my bones. I felt like I was vibrating. Though this was entirely voluntary on my part, I felt like I was being propelled by some invisible force. I thought about Liam—his built figure, his strong hands, his reddish hair combed away from his forehead, and his button chin—and tried to picture what a baby with him would look like.
Trial and error produced a decent image, one that involved his arm around my shoulders as I held his baby—ourbaby.
I shook my head. That was just another fantasy. My only connection to him was providing him a healthy child. No more than that was required of me. And while I felt honored that he’d chosen me on the first round, I was worried he would rush into the lobby any second now and change his mind.
But why?He meant nothing to me other than a paycheck. Admittedly, it was harsh to think of it in those terms, but they were true, nonetheless. This surrogacy would set me up for the next year. I wouldn’t have to work as many hours at the clinic, and I would be free to catch up with reading all those books I kept buying and stacking on my dresser.
The door next to the front desk opened. Patricia stood there with a sunny grin and a clipboard. “Good morning, Anita. I’m glad to see you back so soon.”
“Me too.” I bounced from the seat and dashed toward her, tripping over my boot on the way. “Oops, I should have taken my balancing pills this morning with my IVF medication, right?”
Patricia chuckled politely. Nobody could have thought that joke was even remotely funny. Now Iknewthe secretary would be laughing hysterically as soon as I was safely locked behind the clinic door. A rush of white noise played low in the background, creating a serene walk past Patricia’s office to a clinical room a few doors down and to the right.
Inside was a medical table with the stirrups, a curtain, and a couple of computers. Sterile equipment sat on the table along with a sealed cup of white liquid and what looked like a turkey baster—right next to Liam.
My stomach flipped. “You’re here.”
“Yeah, I wouldn’t miss this for the world.” He extended his hand and guided me to the medical table. “I mean, I can leave when you undress.”
He turned three shades of red in under three seconds. Impressive.
Patricia chuckled lightheartedly as she shut the door behind us. “We’ll get to that in just a moment. I want to check Anita’s temperature first.”
“Should I sit?” I pointed to the table. Then I pointed to a chair. Then I just clutched my tote even harder. “I’m not sure what to do.”
