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But there she was, stubbornly existing in the corners of my consciousness, refusing to be dismissed. She was more than a mere distraction; she was a mystery that beckoned to be unraveled.
As the night deepened and stars began to dot the canvas above, I knew I needed to confront this conflict head-on. It wasn't in my nature to let ambiguity fester. So, I resolved to see her again, to have a conversation that might clear the fog that had settled between us. I needed to understand if there was something more, something substantial, beyond the surface-level interactions we had been having.
Tomorrow, I’d reach out to her, and invite her for a casual meeting. I’d put aside my irrational thoughts, and my unfounded suspicions, and approach her with the same honesty that I expected from her. Maybe then, I could untangle the threads of curiosity and attraction that had been woven between us.
Maybe then, I could find a semblance of clarity amid the confusing emotions she had awakened.
I leaned back in my chair, rubbing my temples as I conceded that avoidance was my best option. It wasn't fair to Olivia, who had done nothing to warrant this sudden withdrawal. But I couldn’t afford to let history repeat itself.
Audrey's betrayal still held its grip on me, a reminder of the emotional entanglement that had nearly destroyed me. I refused to let another person hold that power over me.
As I contemplated my plan of action, I knew that maintaining distance was the only solution. I’d already invited her to the ranch under the pretense of tending to the animals, and I couldn’t retract that without arousing suspicion. So, I’d limit our interactions to the necessities, keep our conversations professional, and maintain the emotional barricade I’d built around myself.
The following days were a test of my resolve. Every instinct in me longed to reach out, to hear her voice, to see her smile. But I fought against it, reminding myself of the potential danger.
I stopped sending texts, halted the casual phone calls, and found reasons to immerse myself in work whenever she was around.
“You busy, Ben?”
“Oh, hi, Olivia. I’m, yes. But do you need something?”
“Well, not exactly. I only thought to say hi to you. I’ve been here for a while, checking the animals at the south end. I only got notified you were here a few minutes ago.”
“Oh, is that right?” I dragged my words out, unsure what to say.
“I should be on my way now. Like I said, I only stopped to greet you.”
“That’s kind of you. I’ll just get back to brushing the furs on her.” I said, pointing to the lamb already playing with her flocksome distance away. I must’ve looked like a fool saying what I just said, but I didn’t care.
She smiled faintly and turned to walk away. I watched her go, and then I began to regret it. What was that for?
Every day felt like a battle against me. I was determined to avoid Olivia at all costs, to keep my distance and shield myself from the emotional turmoil she seemed to incite within me. I busied myself with ranch affairs, hoping that the frenzy of work would drown out the thoughts of her that persisted like a stubborn echo.
But life has a way of throwing curveballs just when you think You’ve everything under control. One evening, as rain pounded against the windows and thunder rumbled in the distance, my son Michael's cough escalated into a full-blown asthma attack. Panic seized me as I held him in my arms, struggling to calm his wheezing and labored breathing. It was a frightening reminder of the fragility of life and the uncertainty that loomed over us.
I rushed him to the hospital, the sound of his strained breath haunting me every step of the way.
“Get me a doctor now!” I screamed from the entrance of the doors.
“Yes, sir!” A nurse stationed at the reception replied, rushing down the hallways to attend to my needs.
The emergency room was a blur of doctors and nurses, of beeping machines, and hurried conversations. I held onto Michael's small hand, my heart aching with fear for his well-being.
“He’ll be fine, sir. We got him from here. Just wait a while for us outside before you join us again.”
The doctor's words were clinical and directed at me. After that, he directed a string of medical terms to the nurses around him that I struggled to grasp, my thoughts consumed by the image of my son struggling for air.
Amid the medical chaos, I couldn’t help but be frustrated by my thoughts. Even in this critical moment, Olivia's face seemed to intrude, her presence an unwelcome distraction. It angered me that my mind would wander to her at a time like this when my focus should’ve been solely on my son's recovery.
Hours stretched into what felt like an eternity, and finally, Michael's breathing stabilized. The doctor had come out to meet me.
“He’s stable now. You can also go see him for as long as you want.” He assured me.
“I’m sure You’ven’t been taking your time, but with the right treatment and care here, he’ll be alright in a few days.” I nodded, my gratitude mingling with the exhaustion that had settled deep within me.
As I sat by Michael's bedside, watching him sleep, I couldn’t shake the feeling of vulnerability that had gripped me. My son's health was a constant source of worry, a reminder that no matter how much control I sought to maintain, life had a way of throwing me off balance. And as much as I tried to distance myself from Olivia, the events of the day served as a stark reminder of how intertwined our lives had become.
Despite my best efforts, my thoughts drifted to her. I wondered if she had ever experienced the gut-wrenching fear of a loved one's illness. I wondered if she understood the weight of responsibility that came with caring for another's well-being.
