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I laugh. Yeah, I suppose.
“So if you’re buying lingerie for your first date, that must mean your plan to have him save you from an intruder actually worked out?”
She sighs, holding the store’s door open behind her. “You ruined it with all your logic. And I guess itwouldsuck to have the police show up instead, especially if I was standing there naked. Anyway, I’ve got a much better plan.”
I guarantee it doesn’t involve anything rational, like perhaps telling him how she feels.
She shoves a thong and bra at me. “Get these. It’ll make Caleb forget all about how tardy you’ve been.”
I take a look at the price tag and hand them back to her. “It probably would, but I’m not really in the market for a hundred-and-ten-dollar thong at present, plus that bra offers no support whatsoever.”
“Everything is half off,” she argues. “And a bra like this isn’t supposed to offer support. Your aim should only be its removal.”
I picture Caleb seeing me in it and I’m tempted, but this isn’t the time to splash out on things I don’t need. “I’m broke and I don’t know when Caleb and I will be alone again. The twins are home next weekend and I can’t count on Jeremy even when he’ssupposedto take them.”
“Let me watch the twins. I need some parenting practice before little Damien arrives anyway.” She pats her stomach as if his arrival is imminent and starts telling me about her latest plan to woo Michael. “Okay, so hear me out. When you and Caleb get married—”
“Married?” I laugh. “Molly, we just started dating.”
“I told you to hear me out. When you and Caleb get married, I’ll ask Michael to be my fake date and he’ll growsurprisingly protective of me when my ex, who happens to be there, either professes his love or behaves aggressively.”
There are so many things wrong with this plan I’m not sure where to begin, but—
“You’re okay if there’s a fistfight over me on the dance floor, yes?” she continues, walking to the register. “It won’t be during the first dance, obviously. Just later when everyone’s drunk.”
“Wasn’t your last boyfriend in grad school? Why would he be invited to my wedding?”
“You’re ruining this with logic again, Lucie. Doesn’t Caleb have a friend who’ll pretend to be in love with me?”
I raise a brow. “And getpunchedwhile he’s at it?”
“I think men have a higher pain tolerance. He’d barely notice.”
“Sure, Molly. At my wedding to a guyI just started seeingand who’s still married to someone else, I’ll make sure he has a friend willing to get punched on behalf of a stranger.”
She hands me a bag. “I bought you the bra and thong, by the way. Go have all the sex I’m not having with them on. Plus a vibrator for when he’s gone.”
I stare at the contents. “Oh, Molly, you shouldn’t have.”
“It just gets me that much closer to the fight at your wedding you’ve agreed to help me orchestrate,” she replies, “so we both benefit.”
I unlock the car and we climb in. “I’m not even sure his wife knows about the divorce yet. You might be waiting a long time.”
She pauses in the middle of fastening her seat belt. “What happens if she gets those divorce papers and comes running back home to talk him out of it? Are you sure he’ll still go through with everything?”
This entire time, I’ve pictured it occurring at a distance—his wife in another state, Caleb here. I never pictured them coming face-to-face again.
“Of course I’m sure,” I reply.
She winces. We’ve both heard the truth in my voice, if not my words: I’m not sure about that. I’m not sure at all.
ON FRIDAY, Molly comes over for dinner, and once the twins are in their pajamas and settled in front of a movie, I get dressed, with the new lingerie on underneath. “Don’t feel like you need to come home,” Molly says as she walks me to the door. “Your kids, like, make their own breakfast and shit, right?”
“I think maybe I’ll plan on coming home.”
“Oh, and text me as soon as he’s seen the bra. If I had your rack, I’d be in Michael’s office this minute doing jumping jacks. Maybe I’ll try that anyway. I bet he’s still at work.”
I fumble for my keys. “You’re babysitting, so you can’t just leave.”
