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With two fingers of whiskey, I sit in my leather chair in front of the fire and sigh.
Today would have been Jessica’s thirty-sixth birthday.
I didn’t mention it to anyone.Johnny was only two when she died, and he has no memory of her.Jessica’s family moved away from Bitterroot Valley after her death because they said it was too painful to be reminded of her all the time.
So, there’s no one here to remember her with me.
Jess wasn’t the love of my life.We married because she was pregnant, and we were friends.Ilikedher a lot, and we did well as co-parents.We were a good team.
But was there love?Passion?Not really.
And I never felt guilty about that because it was the same for her.
But it feels wrong that today, on her birthday, it’s just another day.Hell, I didn’t evenrememberuntil I had tucked Holly in and passed by Jess’s picture in the hallway.
Blowing out a breath, I lift my glass in salute.“Happy Birthday, Jess.”
“I can’t find Holly.”
I turn and scowl at my son.“What?”
Without waiting for him to answer, I rush upstairs, with Johnny right behind me.
“She’s not in her room,” he says.“I don’t know where she went.”
“Holly!”I yell her name as I search every room on the second floor and do the same downstairs.“Shit, Holly!”
“Did she die?”Johnny asks, tears filling his eyes.I turn to him and scoop him into my arms.
“Definitely not.She’s just hiding.”I kiss his cheek and pull my phone out of my pocket, just as it rings.
It’s my senior ranch hand, Lucky.
“Yeah.”
“Your little princess is in the barn, boss,” he says in my ear, and I deflate in relief.“Found her petting the filly.”
“I’m on my way.”I hang up and set Johnny on his feet.“Get your stuff for school, and I’ll grab Holly’s.”
We drive to the barn, and I rush inside and find my daughter giggling as the filly sniffs at her neck.
“Holly Wild.”
Her gaze snaps up to mine, and there’s guilt in her eyes.
“Get out of that stallnow.”
“Daddy, I just wanted to see the babies.”
“You know you’re not allowed in the barn by yourself.”I pick her up and head for the SUV.“Thanks, Lucky.”
“You bet, boss.”
“It’s a good thing you’re dressed, or you’d be going to school in your pajamas.”
“Why are you mad?”she asks as I set her in the back seat.“It’s just the barn.”
“You’refive,” I remind her.“I make the rules here, and you know you’re not allowed to wander around the property by yourself.We have animals out here, Holly.You saw the big bear we had last fall.”
