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"Baby, no," I breathe, quickly pulling her back down into my arms.
"Leave me alone, Cormac," she growls, trying to shake me off as her bottom lip quivers and two big tears roll down her cheeks.
To hell with that, though. I'm not going anywhere, and neither is she.
"Let me go," she pleads, her voice ragged and brittle. More vulnerable than it's ever been.
"No."
What little composure she has left cracks. A sob escapes her lips, shattering my heart.
I scoop her up as she falls apart in my arms, crying like I'm guessing she hasn't cried since she watched her boss die. She clings to me, her face buried in my throat as tears pour down her face and her little body shakes with the force of her cries. Every sob leaves me howling for blood and mad as hell at myself.
"I'm sorry," I croon, cradling her close as she purges herself of the trauma. "It's okay, baby. I'm right here, and you're safe now. Everything is going to be okay."
She tries to say something, but it just sounds like gibberish to me.
I hold her and croon to her, wishing like hell we could go back ten minutes and start over. I'm not supposed to be the motherfucker who makes this goddess cry. If there is a guidebook to getting someone to fall in love with you, I'm almost certain that's item number one. I've listened to my brothers say the same shit for the last year and a half. Never be the reason for their tears.
Crash crawls closer, laying his head against her thigh. He whines low in his throat, looking at me as if to ask what the fuck I did and why the fuck I haven't fixed it yet and made her smile again. It's a sad day when even the dog knows you fucked up.
It takes a good half hour for Bella to cry herself out. When she finally does, she lies quietly in my arms, shudders still wracking her body periodically.
"My dad d-didn't send me here because he was afraid that he couldn't p-protect me from them," she whispers, her voice muffled. "He s-sent me because he was afraid that he c-couldn't protect me f-from m-me." Her warm breath pelts my skin as she sighs sadly. "He didn't trust me not to do something stupid."
"Your dad loves you, Mischief." I know that much for a fact. I talked to the man. He's beside himself with worry, terrified out of his mind that he's going to lose his daughter. He sent her here because he needs her safe.
"I know that." She lifts her head, breathtaking in her sorrow. "But two things can be true at the same time, Cormac." She gives me a sad smile. "To him, I'll always be the headstrong little girl who goes looking for trouble. That's what he expected me to do this time…go looking for trouble. He sent me here to make sure I couldn't do that. I didn't even get a chance to prove I wouldn't."
Shit. No wonder she feels like this is a prison.
And I told her she needs fucking permission to take the dog outside.
Iaman asshole. But this asshole can be taught.
"I'm not your dad, Bella," I murmur, gently wiping her face.
"You thought I ran off."
"I wasn't worried about you looking for trouble." I exhale a breath. Maybe I should have been, but shit, I'm the last motherfucker to judge someone for looking for trouble when that's all I do. I suppose the fact that she's the same way is divine providence. God is probably yukking it up right now, just waiting to see how karma bites me in the ass with this girl for the thirty-five years of hell I've raised.
I can tell by her expression that she doesn't believe me.
"You matter to me," I say, laying my cards on the table. "I've been waiting for you my entire life. I'm trying to give you time to get on the same page, but I'm an impatient bastard. Going slow with you is hard as hell when I want everything, and I want it right now. I was worried I pushed too far, too soon, and you bolted on me."
"Oh," she whispers, her red-rimmed eyes searching across my face.
"And then I was worried as hell that something might have happened to you. There's a ravine about a mile behind the house. It's half a mile deep. If you were to fall into that…."
Her face pales, understanding dawning.
"And then I thought about someone grabbing you off the road and stuffing you into the trunk." I tip my head back, expelling a slow breath as my blood pressure rises again at the mere thought. "I went through about fifteen different ways I could have lost you, Mischief. It fucked me up a little bit."
"I'm sorry," she whispers.
I tilt my head forward again. "You have nothing to be sorry about. You aren't a prisoner here. You're allowed to go outside without permission. Of course you are."
"I tried to kick you."
