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“Very true, but I’m serious, Laur—Madeline. I am going to spoil you. It’ll be a first for me. I want to see how it feels to watch you be happy. To see your face light up at what I can give you.” His lips pulled to the side, and he leaned over, kissing my cheek. “I’ve been thinking about it all morning. What we have will be different. Location won’t change that. It really only enhances it. This will be right.”
We got on the elevator, and I kept my stare down. My mind was racing, and I didn’t know what to think. This man, this Master, I didn’t know him. Not this version. Where it was easy to pretend when my life was on the line, Edward’s happiness messed with me. It softened me and peeled back layers of a reality I couldn’t quite grasp. I was so unstable underneath it all. One minute I wanted to cry. The next, my heart melted at the thought anyone would want to marry and love me. Especially someone who bought me with the intention to kill. It was too much on top of everything else I was trying to sort out within myself.
“You’re still pale off and on. I don’t like it. Are you feeling okay?”
Hands were pressing against my heated cheeks. No, I wasn’t feeling okay. How could I when I had to marry a man I didn’t know? Marry a man who would probably murder me? Marry a man who controlled my life. Who planned to kill his child to see if he could. A man who had killed—
I swayed, grabbing to my Master as the elevator stopped and the door slid open. It was the clinic’s floor and getting a sense of balance wasn’t quite there. Edward could tell something was wrong as he led me into the lobby area.
“Can I sit for a moment?” Tighter my fist gripped to his dark shirt. It was for nothing since he practically carried me to a nearby bench.
“Are you going to pass out again? What’s wrong?”
“I’m not sure. I’m just a little dizzy. Sometimes that happens before I start my period. It’ll pass. It’s probably just my hormones trying to sort themselves out. They’ve been pretty unstable since Patrick.”
Tears immediately made the large space blur. Yes, I wasn’t well. I was damn near bordering hysterics. I had to calm. To try to reign in the mass of emotions trying to drown me. Depression, terror, grief. They were so well hidden under the mask of the doting, sweet slave. God, I needed help. I needed to scream and cry. To lose it completely and go as crazy as I felt.
“Madeline.” My name had my eyes coming up. I was damn near hyperventilating as I fought odd, broken breaths I couldn’t control. They kept forcing their way free, choking me. Trying to reveal their true identity as sobs. As a fucking sea of sorrow. “Madeline, honey, breathe. You’re okay. You’re safe. Look at me.”
But I already was, and nothing about who I was seeing put me at ease. I couldn’t trust Edward. I couldn’t trust anyone here. Where was my son? Was he safe? Was he even here anymore? During my search, I looked for anything that might hint of children. Of babies. I saw nothing.
“I can’t b-breathe. I suddenly…I worry—”
“Walk with me. Let’s go into the clinic. The doctor needs to check you. They’ll help with whatever this is.”
“I’m not sure they can help.”
“They will. I’llmakethem.”
The tone was one I knew well. One that threatened degrees of danger I didn’t want to witness. But it wasn’t directed to me. It wasforme. That somehow helped me breathe easier. It reminded me just how much my hard work had paid off. I feared this man, but that would pass for the moment if I just kept focused.
“You’re so good to m-me.” My breath was still shaky, but the episode was passing. “I feel like I keep letting you down.”
“Letting me down?” A smile tugged at his lips as he moved in, nuzzling my face. “You’re not letting me down. You’re giving me the experience of a lifetime.”
My lips parted. “I am?”
“Madeline.” He stopped, his face returning to the stoic mask he so often wore. “Let’s get you to the room. We’ll talk in there.”
I stood, regardless that I still had the need to run. It was a sensation that had been with me since the tunnels. Freedom: run. Survive: run. Safety: …obey.Comply.And so I had; I continued to. The only way I would make it in this world was to pretend. To live a lie. It didn’t take me long to figure that part out, but how long would I last trying? That was the question that constantly gnawed at me.
Nodding, I allowed Edward to lead me through the double doors. If we were in a clinic, I hadn’t been to one so luxurious or nice. Glass tables filled with magazines sat every four chairs, and there were two large screen TV’s on each side of the room. Trays of fruit and random snacks were resting on fancy placements, surrounded by crystal pitchers of different beverages. Fresh baked bread and cookies were on a far table, and I craned my neck, scanning the surroundings. Where I expected the typical landscapes to decorate the room, I quickly noticed that was not the case here. Pastel paintings of mothers and babies were placed throughout.
“Edward.” His name came out as a confused whisper. “Are we in the right place? I don’t think this is the clinic I’m supposed to be at.”
Before he could answer, a younger woman in a yellow headdress put down the phone and gave us a smile.
“Master and slave number?”
Edward stepped us forward. “Master Nine-hundred-ninety-nine and fc thirteen-fifteen.”
A few seconds passed, and her smile grew as she looked up from her monitor. “I have you right here. Have a seat or help yourself to a snack. You’ll be called back shortly.”
Somehow my hand had made it just above my Master’s elbow. I was holding tight as he led us toward the seating. I couldn’t stop scanning the room, taking everything in.
“Did you want anything to eat or drink? Maybe some sugar would be good.”
All I could do was give a shake as I took in all the parenting books and magazines next to the seat. Even the television was playing a show on the importance of prenatal care.
