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The entire situation left me with my head spinning, and as I got dressed and headed downstairs, I prepared myself for whatever Jordan would have for me that day.
“It’s about time you came down,” she said. “I didn’t know you were in the shower, or I might have brought you something up.”
“I’m glad you didn’t,” I said. “I was showering, and prefer privacy when I do that.”
“Oh, come on, I know how you like your showers,” she teased.
I knew she was trying to flirt with me, and grasping at any way she could use innuendo, but I refused to go down that path withher. I was glad Lucy was far too young to pick up on any of that. But I still didn’t want it to even be a topic of conversation.
I was so done with the romantic side of the relationship I had with Jordan; I had no interest at all with even joking about it. But I also didn’t want to start a fight, so I let the entire conversation fall flat. It was far easier that way than to try to tell her I didn’t want to talk about it.
“Thanks for making breakfast,” I said.
I held back from asking if she’d poisoned it. Part of me wanted to throw that out there to remind her yet again I didn’t trust her with anything. But I held back. There was another side of me that worried I would put the idea in her head and she would carry it out.
“Of course, isn’t that what I should be doing?” she asked.
“I mean, if you’re going to stay here, you might as well,” I said, my tone dry.
She laughed. “I don’t mind doing the cooking and cleaning. I think there’s something traditional and homey about it, and those are things that are dying in this modern world, if you know what I mean.”
“I’m not sure it’s traditional for the parents to be divorced,” I remarked.
“What’s divorced?” Lucy asked suddenly.
I kicked myself. I was adamant she wasn’t going to be involved in adult things, and with such a touchy subject, I really didn’t want to have my ex-wife present when I talked to her about it. It wasn’t the first time she’d asked, and it wasn’t the first time I had explained things to her. But I was always very careful with how I chose to do things, and I wasn’t sure how Jordan would ruin what I had done so far.
“It’s just a word that describes how Mommy and Daddy are talking to each other right now,” Jordan said, oddly coming to the rescue and leaving the conversation simple.
Her answer seemed to satisfy Lucy, who turned her attention back to her breakfast and the cartoons that were playing on TV. I said nothing as I poured myself a cup of coffee and sat at the table. Jordan got a plate for herself, then sat right next to me, just as she used to when we were together.
I had to bite my tongue to keep myself from asking her what she was doing. She had been at the house an entire week, and she didn’t seem to have any plans to leave anytime soon. I had told her she could see Lucy, but I wasn’t going to let her move back in with me on a permanent basis.
I wasn’t even sure I would let her stay for another full week. I had no interest in living with her again, and I was incredibly suspicious over her intentions. I didn’t want to talk about her leaving with Lucy around, however. I felt Lucy had far too many people in her life who were in and out and in and out.
She had to have stability. I wanted her to have stability. And Jordan was far from stable.
“What are you doing with yourself today?” Jordan asked me. “You’ve been working hard all week; I was hoping you might be able to spend the day with us.”
“Us?” I asked, giving her a look.
“Lucy and me, of course,” she said with a giggle. “Who else?”
“I have work to do,” I said. “If you’re going to be here with Lucy, I’m going to keep working.”
I tried to make the message clear. I had no interest in hanging out with my ex. I would supervise from a distance if she was here with Lucy, but I wasn’t going to be taking any time off work to hang out with her.
“Okay then,” she said. “Well, I was thinking of making some cookies with Lucy this afternoon. If you don’t mind, I was going to take her to the store with me to get the things we need, and you can join us when we get back. If you’re too busy with your work, however, we’re fine. We can do it ourselves.”
“I have work,” I said. “You know this, Jordan.”
“And it’s one of the many things I admire about you,” she said. “Your work ethic, I mean.”
She gave me a warm smile, and I felt myself go on high alert. I wasn’t sure what she had planned, but I was watching her. I didn’t trust anything nice she had to say to me. That’s all there was to it.
“It’s fine if you want to take Lucy to the store,” I said. “But try to get her back in time for her nap today, okay?”
“Of course,” she said. “I’m so sorry about yesterday and having her out late. I lost track of time while we were having so much fun at the pool.”
