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It’s a new sensation for me to even make the first move. I couldn’t meet his eyes when I told him about the Zulu bar, but when he went to protest, I saw a look cross on his face between longing and pain.
I can’t decide which was more prominent.
If he doesn’t want me, then I will move on from this.
I’ll forget all about it, because my life will not revolve around a man again like it did before. I’m a strong, capable woman, and I can make my own decisions about who I spend my time with and who I let in my bed. If Lukas doesn’t want to be in it, then more fool him.
I’ll deal with it.
I’m taking control. So, Mr. CEO can suck it.
Despite my gung-ho attitude this morning, I don’t feel quite as confident now. Sitting here at the bar with a martini is only a ploy, as my nerves are all over the place.
I try to remember a time when I wasn’t this nervous, and nothing comes to mind. Even my first freaking interview for my very first job doesn’t compare.
Being in Lukas Bentley’s presence is a whole new world altogether, and I can’t believe I said what I did. Well, I guess it’ll sort the men from the boys.
I’m so sick and tired of being told what to do, what to think, what to be by everyone; society at large, my dad and stepmom. I just want to break away and be free to be me.
So this is me being true to myself. No holds barred.
I’m attracted to Lukas Bentley. Hell, I freaking propositioned him!
Take a sip.
I have to pace myself. I don’t want to get sloshed, as I need my head in the game… that’s if he even shows up.
My stomach churns at the thought he may stand me up, and there’s a good chance he will.
I saw his packed suitcase on the rack close to the bed as I walked past his bedroom.
Leaving early, because of me.
I know I affect him, but he doesn’t have to be an ass about it. Even if he is trying to dothe right thing.Maybe I don’t want him to do the right thing, maybe I want him to give me dirty, hot, nasty sex and use my body for pleasure.Maybe I want to drown in him, just for a night.
Lose myself. See what it’s like to lose total control. Maybe I need it.
Who am I right now?
I don’t know, but being on this holiday and enjoying my friends, and my freedom, has given me a newly found insight to how I want to live my life: on my terms.
It’s so fucking liberating.
I glance up at the clock, and my heart deflates. It’s a few minutes past eight, and he’s not here. I glance at my phone for the zillionth time to see no message.
Mr. Bentley is the type of man who is prompt. He’d never be late.
So I imagined it all?
Maybe I did. Maybe he’d just had one too many too that night, and the kiss didn’t mean anything.
I sigh and tap my fingers on the bar.I should order another to dull the disappointment...
“Ariana,” comes a low but dark voice at my shoulder.
I smell his cologne, and a jolt of excitement encases me as my stomach flutters at the way he says my name.
I turn and meet his stormy, fierce eyes as his brows knot together.
