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Let it go, it’ll only hurt worse in the end.
I know it’s true.
I should know better than to latch onto what feels good, because what feels good isn’t always what’s best for you.
“Did you ask him?” Charlize butts in.
I shake my head. “No, but when I mentioned that we shouldn’t be doing what we’re doing, but it felt too good to stop, he said I summed it up pretty well. He didn’t say anything about continuing on or wanting to see me, though.” I sound pathetic, then add, “Not that I want that.”
“You’re crazy about him,” Imogen states, still staring down at the magazine she’s flicking through. “It’s written all over you.”
“I am not.” I laugh.
“I think Imi’s right,” Charlize adds. “You could just hint a little bit, see where he’s at with it?”
“I think if he wanted to see me again, he’d have already asked,” I reply, hoping I don’t sound like a sap. “And I’d rather die than ask him anything like that. He’s Lukas Bentley. He can have any chick he wants.”
“So, what does that mean?” Charlize snaps back. “Who gives a fuck who he is? He’s not freaking royalty for Christ’s sake, he’s your ex’s dad. Boo-hoo. Everyone will get over it. And it’s not like he seems to care. You’ve been in his bed every night. I think you owe it to yourself to see if there’s anything more to it than just a holiday romp.”
A part of me wishes I could be that brave and ask him. Even when I’m unsure how he feels, if anything.
It’s all great on vacation, thousands of miles away in a luxury resort. One that I wish I never had to leave from. They’re right; this is a bitch.
“I don’t even know what I want,” I say, because it’s the truth. “I’m still trying to work it out. Lukas isn’t like any other man I’ve been with. He’s a good man, but I don’t think that this is anything more than what it is. And I don’t want to dwell on that. And when he’s gone, I don’t want to be sad. I want to remember it for what it was; the best time of my life. And I’ve got you guys to thank for it.”
“That’s it!” Charlize, says, waving her hands at me. “Get in here for a group hug. You’re going to make me cry.”
“You’ll cry over anything,” I admonish, though we group hug it out.
I really do have the best friends in the world.
I stare at the white bag that has been delivered to my suite, and when I open the contents, I gasp at the luxuriousness of the skimpy but silky and beautiful material of the teddy that Mr. B just had delivered. It’s white and see-through, with mesh all around the front of the bodice and a high cut G-string in the back.
There’s a note:Can’t wait to see how this looks on you… and off you. Mr. B x
I grin to myself as I take a shower and try it on. It’s very, very sexy.
I feel giddy thinking about the fact that he picked this out for me, and that he gets to see me in it later.
I take extra special care with my makeup tonight, since we’re having dinner, and I try not to think about tonight being the last night I may ever see him again.
The girls have been so nice about me flitting off every evening, though I usually eat with them first, then slip up to his suite late at night.
He’s always waiting for me. Hungry for me.
When I see him each time, he pulls me into his arms and kisses me like he’s a starving man. Sometimes I don’t even make it in the door and he’s on me, pinning me against the wall, undoing my dress, kissing me and whispering dirty things in my ear.
The man is insatiable, and I’ve had more sex on this trip than I have in the last five years put together.
We meet down in the lobby as he wants to take me out somewhere special.
When our eyes meet as the elevator opens, all I see is the raw passion behind his stare as his eyes rake over me. That’s the other thing, Lukas always lets you know when he appreciates something.
I wore a white dress with gold sandals and a matching gold belt.
When I reach him, he pulls me to him and kisses me roughly, dirty, right there in the middle of the lobby. His tongue sweeps into my mouth as I grip the collar on his shirt.
“Fuck,” he whispers in my ear as we break away and embrace. “I don’t know if I should just cancel dinner and take you upstairs and fuck you till the sun comes up.”
