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“What?” He yawns.
My heart starts to race, thumping loudly in my ears and making it so that I can barely hear myself think, let alone speak. “I love you, too.”
“I know.”
I smack him on the chest, but he laughs in response.
“Now I just have to convince you to move in and have my babies.”
Ice pours down my body, and I can’t move. I lie awake the entire night after coming to the realization that I don’t deserve Carter.
Not only that, but I have to do the one thing I told him I wouldn’t.
I have to run.
Again.
21
CARTER
Avery left me. She stopped answering my calls or texts. She ignored me when I showed up at the school, and not even Chris could help me get through to her.
“What the hell did I do wrong?”
The beer I haven’t had a sip of can’t answer back, though. And sitting in Lucy’s bar at lunchtime, waiting for Will Andrews, does nothing for my self-esteem. I can’t even remember what he looks like, and yet I compare myself to his memory. I’m lucky he even agreed to meet me after I lied to Avery about it and rescheduled the meeting.
“Hey, you’re Carter Matthews, right?” I look up from my still-full glass and stare into the eyes of a hesitant man.
“Yeah, Will?” I hold out my hand to shake his, turning away from the bar. “Nice to meet you.”
Will Andrews stands there in a pair of jeans and a black t-shirt, wearing a baseball hat indoors. He has stark blue eyes and blond hair that sticks out from under his hat. He looks like a fuckin’ model and I want to punch him in the face just for existing.
Then I remember where I’ve seen him before. “You’re playing baseball professionally now, right?”
He shakes my hand and nods. “Yeah, I play for Boston now. About as close to home as I’ll get, though. You played for California, right?”
“For a little bit.” I admit. “Money’s better than the badge, but I love what I’m doing.”
After he orders a beer and sets his hat down on the bar next to his stool, Will turns to me with a grim expression. That’s when I see the faded scar that runs down the side of his face. A scar with the pink still fading, and I realize he must have gotten it in the accident that gave Avery her scars.
“Deacon insisted I speak to you and damned near threatened me when I tried to tell him no.” Will takes a long drink from his beer. “I figured it would be in my best interest to make the trip.” He laughs. “What did you want to talk about?”
“Avery James.” Two words. Even saying her name hurts, but I don’t let that slip through my mask. “I want to talk about what happened with you two.”
“Shit, man. I can’t talk to you about Avery.” He slides back from the bar. “I’m sorry, but that’s not gonna happen. If Deacon had told me on the phone what it was that you wanted to talk about, I’d have saved myself the trip.”
When he turns to leave, I grab him by the arm to stop him. “Please, Will. I’m in love with her. But she won’t talk about you. She won’t tell me what happened. I can’t ask her to move forward if she’s still heartbroken that you left her.”
Baring myself like that, to a virtual stranger, cuts deep. Except I need the information, and the only person in the world I stand a chance of getting it from is standing in front of me, about to walk away. I have to stop him, because I can’t get Avery to talk to me about it, let alone anything else right now.
“Fuck, man. You really do love her.” Will whistles, but he doesn’t leave. Instead, he turns back around and orders another drink. “You’re not gonna drink?”
“No,” I tell him. “Avery’s rules about not drinking at all when you’re going to drive are stuck in my head. I ordered it thinking I might be able to push past it, but I can’t.”
“Ha.” He holds up his phone. “She got me too. I already made sure that I’ve got a ride from my brother when I’m done here. Fuckin’ A.” He slaps me on the shoulder. “She gets under your skin, doesn’t she.”
“Like a parasite,” I admit. “Couldn’t get rid of her if I tried. Or wanted to. Can’t even get her off my mind any minute of the day.”
